How do I deal with this?

[79pacecar]

So my buddy comes over today, he has a bent pin for something.. I didn't get all of the details of what it was for, I was working on a paying job & he has been out here 100's of times so I didn't pay to much attention to what he was doing.. Anyway after a bit I hear some banging I look over & he is using my 3/4 blanchard ground plate as a beat board!!!!!! Its not a hardened plate & there are some good sized dents in it..

I started out telling (well maybe yelling at) him that, that plate was made to check how flat/straight something was, NOT to do the actual work on... He yell's back at me that he has seen me do the same thing before & what the F**K is my problem.. I tell him, no I will check the pin on the plate & beat on it on the weld bench, he says the F**K you do and storms out!

We have been buds for years & never had so much as an argument, at this point he is extremely pissed at me & I am still a bit pissed at him, My wife says to get the plate re-ground & show him the bill just so he knows why I got so upset. Maybe he will calm down & pay the bill she says... (she doesn't have my temper) and is most likely right.. But what do you guys think?

Thanks!

 

[StumpXJ]

Kick his ***? Make him pay the bill to get it re-ground? Take him to small claims court? write *u*k you on his lawn with round up?

naw... stuff happens man. He obviously didnt know what he was beating on right? If there is one thing I have realized, good friends are hard to come by. Talk to him. Let him know why you freaked all of a sudden, you didnt mean to yell at him..yadda yadda. Tell him you dont appreciate the way he yelled back at you after screwing YOUR equipment up either. Then, shake hands, enjoy a beer and move on with life. Women have this kind of drama, not guys.. Just talk about it, get it over with, and move on. Its just a machine/tool/object, no matter how expensive it is. Good buds are worth more.

~James

 

[tatra]

your shop, your rules..........

 

[Bull]

He comes to your place to do work with your tools 100s of times, then yells and swears at you when you correct him AND he damaged your stuff? I wouldn't let that one slide.

If he makes the first move and comes to you and apologizes, then the friendship can continue. Otherwise, he was merely a long time and not lifelong friend.

That's how I roll. If someone seriously betrays the man-code (Honor, Respect, Reciprocity) then I burn the bridge, dynamite the town, and salt the earth on the way out.

 

[krusty the clown]

Kick his ***? Make him pay the bill to get it re-ground? Take him to small claims court? write *u*k you on his lawn with round up?

naw... stuff happens man. He obviously didnt know what he was beating on right? If there is one thing I have realized, good friends are hard to come by. Talk to him. Let him know why you freaked all of a sudden, you didnt mean to yell at him..yadda yadda. Tell him you dont appreciate the way he yelled back at you after screwing YOUR equipment up either. Then, shake hands, enjoy a beer and move on with life. Women have this kind of drama, not guys.. Just talk about it, get it over with, and move on. Its just a machine/tool/object, no matter how expensive it is. Good buds are worth more.

~James

i agree.........talk to him about it NOT everyone else.

 

[79pacecar]

i agree.........talk to him about it NOT everyone else.

Thanks StumpXJ & Krusty You guys are right, Plus posting it here kinda got it out of my system.. XJ is right he didn't know what he was beating on & the more I think about it, I was pissed when he got here because the job I was working on was going like ****, If that job would have been going well I am sure I would not have jumped on him like I did... and my wife just came back out to the shop, She just got off the phone with my bud's wife (they are good friends too) .. apparently she was all over his **** all day today. to get a few weeks worth of honey-do-list stuff done!!

apparently now she feels bad, he feels bad, and so do I (those are my wife's words not mine)

Sorry for sounding like a woman!!! But in my defense this was the most drama I have seen in years & I just freaked a bit!!!!

 

[LoneGunman]

So he ruins your equipment and he's pissed at you for saying something about it? F**k him, that would be the last time he steps foot in my shop, unless he apologizes and pays to have the plate replaced or reground.

 

[79pacecar]

So he ruins your equipment and he's pissed at you for saying something about it? F**k him, that would be the last time he steps foot in my shop, unless he apologizes and pays to have the plate replaced or reground.

Maybe I should explain a little better, Like I said we have been friends for YEARS.... He has a key to my shop, house & car trailer... He takes care of my dogs when i am gone & I do the same for him. His daughter babysits for us.. We are family...

I guess I have been lucky in life, I don't have a lot of friends, but the friends I do have are more like family than friends & to be honest that is why I posted this message, This is the first fight we've had & I got a bit freaked!!

I think that StumpXJ's post sums it up!!!!


Thanks everybody!!

 

[krusty the clown]

So he ruins your equipment and he's pissed at you for saying something about it? F**k him, that would be the last time he steps foot in my shop, unless he apologizes and pays to have the plate replaced or reground.

to most friendship is more important than material posetions. they were BOTH having a bad day and i'm guessing the apology is forthcoming. i would hate to lose a friend over one incident like that. it's kind like the old eye for an eye thing...........you only got two so you run out quickly.

 

[vette-kid]

He comes to your place to do work with your tools 100s of times, then yells and swears at you when you correct him AND he damaged your stuff? I wouldn't let that one slide.

If he makes the first move and comes to you and apologizes, then the friendship can continue. Otherwise, he was merely a long time and not lifelong friend.

That's how I roll. If someone seriously betrays the man-code (Honor, Respect, Reciprocity) then I burn the bridge, dynamite the town, and salt the earth on the way out.

So he ruins your equipment and he's pissed at you for saying something about it? F**k him, that would be the last time he steps foot in my shop, unless he apologizes and pays to have the plate replaced or reground.

Man, you guys are gonna find yourselves with a short list of friends before long! People screw up, make mistakes, and sometimes they dont even realize it. Approach them about it and 9 times out of 10 they will make it right...if not...then burn the bridge!

 

[79pacecar]

to most friendship is more important than material posetions. they were BOTH having a bad day and i'm guessing the apology is forthcoming. i would hate to lose a friend over one incident like that. it's kind like the old eye for an eye thing...........you only got two so you run out quickly.

Thanks Krusty I agree... At this point I am going to apologize tomorrow & I am willing to bet a weeks pay that he will to.... It was just a bad day.... It happens!!

BTW, I just realized the plate in question is blanchard ground on both sides, So I think I will survive.....

 

[Bull]

Man, you guys are gonna find yourselves with a short list of friends before long!

Already there. And that's ok with me. Bad friends are like cancerous balls...you might have been attached to them for a while but at some point they'll have to go.

Sounds like Pacecar's friend is a good one and not a bad one, though, as far as he is concerned. That's all that matters in this case, so congrats.

 

[krusty the clown]

it's hard to call someone a bad friend after just one screwup........constant screwups are a different story.

 

[Bull]

it's hard to call someone a bad friend after just one screwup........constant screwups are a different story.

I agree with you for the most part. But it depends on the nature of the first offense. I mean, how many guys have discovered that their wife was banging their supposed best friend, for example? Even if he just slipped it in once, that would be enough to call it quits.

 

[krusty the clown]

I agree with you for the most part. But it depends on the nature of the first offense. I mean, how many guys have discovered that their wife was banging their supposed best friend, for example? Even if he just slipped it in once, that would be enough to call it quits.

my wife ran away with my best friend and i really miss him.

 

[Bull]

my wife ran away with my best friend and i really miss him.

lol

 

[LoneGunman]

Already there. And that's ok with me. Bad friends are like cancerous balls...you might have been attached to them for a while but at some point they'll have to go.

Sounds like Pacecar's friend is a good one and not a bad one, though, as far as he is concerned. That's all that matters in this case, so congrats.

LOL that is hysterical, like cancerous balls. It's okay with me also, I don't need friends like that.

 

[diggertodd]

If I made a mistake in someone elses shop, I would not hesitate to repair my mistake.... and I would not expect anything less from a friend...

I don't care if it is someones garage, flower shop or doctors office, I don't start grabbing and bangin...

would any resonal person walk into a chemistry lab and start mixing beakers? "hey I saw you mix a blue and red liquid" why did it explode when I did it????

 

[Torque1st]

Stump has it right.

But-

Check the plate to make sure the other side is still flat. Then make a wood box/cover for the plate.

 

[rsanter]

sorry to say but you have some fault here too
when you know you have other working in your space you need to tell them the rules or you need to lable the surface as not to be hammered on.
better yet, when you have a surface that is flat and true you need to have a protective cover on it so it can be used to other things as well

dont want to instigate, just another opinion

bob

 

[e-tek]

Cancerous balls....lol!!!

Blanshard plate....?? What are these used for?

Friends that take - who needs 'em??!!

 

[Kevin54]

Blanshard plate....?? What are these used for?

Blanchard ground plate. You take a plate of steel and it is ground flat on a blanchard grinder. A blanchard grinder (at least the ones I have been around) has a series of crescent shaped stones mounted on a horizontal wheel above. The steel is put on a magnetic table and it turns in one direction while the grinding stone turns in the opposite therefore grinding the plate perfectly flat.





As far as you "friend for years" biting your head off and you biting his off....go over to his house and bust him right in the mouth. I wouldn't take that **** for a second.


No REALLY.....APOLOGIZE TO HIM. Then explain that you were having a bad day and didn't mean it. The plate can be fixed but sometimes great friendships can't if a problem is let go to long. I'd rather shell a few bucks out of my own pocket than lose a good friend.

 

[Vinko]

But what do you guys think?

Thanks!

If it went down exactly as you say, then I think he's a selfish, immature, disrespectful and ignorant *******.

 

[brownbagg]

get rid of your friend

 

[independentrider]

Man I would rather have 1 good friend than 20 regular friends. regrind the plate and forget about it. Good friends are to hard to find. My best friend was killed a few years ago. maybe in a month or so tell him how much it cost and explain why you got so pissed

 

[GearBeer]

I'm lucky, I have 6 very good friends from childhood. We don't live close to each other any more, but we've had our arguments. Like it or not, your wife's right. Get it fixed, patch things up and drink some beer.

 

[79pacecar]

So my buddy stopped by this morning, We both looked at the ground for awhile, kicked around some gravel, Shook hands & he grabbed the plate and is going to get it re-ground.

He and his wife are coming out this afternoon for some dead cow on the grill and beers, so its all good

I am very happy it worked out!!

 

[Art From De Leon]

This is good to hear!

The 3 friends that have stuck by me are the ones I have known for over 30 years.

 

[babzog]

I don't care if it is someones garage, flower shop or doctors office, I don't start grabbing and bangin...

Well, I dunno... maybe the flower shop...

 

[babzog]

So my buddy stopped by this morning, We both looked at the ground for awhile, kicked around some gravel, Shook hands & he grabbed the plate and is going to get it re-ground.

He and his wife are coming out this afternoon for some dead cow on the grill and beers, so its all good

I am very happy it worked out!!

Perfect, case closed.

My best freind and his lady were out today for some dead cow and pints. Seems he's found himself a new best freind: a yr old golden/lab mix. Nice dog, seems well adjusted around the kids, get's him up early in the morning (LOL).

 

[StumpXJ]

So my buddy stopped by this morning, We both looked at the ground for awhile, kicked around some gravel, Shook hands & he grabbed the plate and is going to get it re-ground.

He and his wife are coming out this afternoon for some dead cow on the grill and beers, so its all good

I am very happy it worked out!!

Good deal. Glad you guys got it straightened out. Years from now you both will say..."remember that time I started beating on that damn plate and you yelled at me like a red headed stepchild?..."

~James

 

[GTR Lover]

if he is a relly good frind thin he wood talk to you about it