Me and My Son

[sneakyfast]

Guys,
Let me apologize in advance as I can tell already that I am going to have a hard time verbalizing the point of this thread.

My Dad was never a work in the shop kind of guy so I have absolutely no memories of working with him on cars or projects. I now have an 8 month old son and have a dream to restore a car or truck with him as he gets older. In my mind it would be a great bonding and memory building experience for us but I also don't want to be the kind of parent that pushes their kids in to their own mold if that makes sense. I also have an innate fear of being fake (again sorry this is hard to describe) or artifically manufacture experiences that aren't genuine.

So what I would love to hear some thoughts from anyone that had a father that worked in a shop and some of the ways it directed their lives...good or bad. Would also love to hear of any memories that stand out...again good or bad.

 

[dirttracker18]

Right there with you.

6 month old son and I am thinking ahead as well.

I too would like to hear some experiences but . . .

I think so long as you explain things and give him meaningful things to do (something he can be proud of when done, not just a hammer and bang on this for a while) it will be meaningful and not fake.

If you/we show genuine interest in them and share our passion at a young age they will 'get into it.'

Best of luck to both of us

I can't wait to put a tool in his hand.

 

[stafford]

Just go out there and work, and if he wants to come along let him. Let him help when you can, he'll make up his mind if he likes it or not.

 

[PeteMoore]

My father only ever had me pushing a non-motorised lawnmower around 1 acre of grass every weekend. Yes, memories, but ones that leave you wondering whether or not you were bred as a slave (which I was in his eyes)

My step-father on the other hand, I have memories of spending time in the garage twidling with various bits and pieces, nothing too specific or in depth, but we were a car family, so it was only a case of as and when I would start messing about on my own...

Id definitely be in your position of wanting to make lasting memories of cutting, welding, A&E (ER) visits, etc. Whether I ever end up with a girl or a boy I want them to spend time in the workshop learning how to use their hands. The world has already come to a standstill due to people who have little more in their skillset than sitting at a PC or cold calling.

I also want my child to be out competing in a vehicle from the youngest age possible. I want to be that competitive dad I never had.

 

[A1an]

I think the key here is not pushing your son/daughter into doing something. You can always suggest ideas, propose projects, etc to see if they are intersted. If they decide to go in on something with you just make sure you can identify when they are getting burned out or disinterested. While a kid may need a little bit of motivation to stay interested (kids do have short attention spans) you don't want to push them through the project to the point where they hate you and/or the project.

DISCLAIMER...I am a parent of a five month old and have zero experience with children. My parenting theory above is made from observing other parents over the years.

 

[classicharleyj]

I will try and write what my heart is saying about my Dad. I grew up with a Dad that was a mechanic and a mom that didn't work outside the home. As a result, we were not wealthy by any stretch, but, all of our cars and trucks ran! Dad was not a patient man and always was busy working on "stuff" and didn't have a lot of time for other Dad and son activities. As I grew up, he decided to get me involved in pulling motors and transmissions, but I have to say it was a bit painful because of his impatience and my lack of desire at times. In spite of all that, I started adulthood as a deisel mechanic on Caterpillar products. I am no longer in the trade, but it taught me independence and where to put things when I was finished with them. I don't regret the way my life turned out, but do wish I had of known more and hadn't been such a snot growing up.
SO... sneaky.... just be patient at whatever you choose to do and just be yourself when showing your children how to grow into adults.... and have fun at it! Life is too short to stress over mistakes they make unless they are life threatening.
Jim

 

[MyKingdom]

My daughter who is 12 now, loves to help around the garage or any project around the house, this all started when she was 2 years old, she helps me mow the lawn with out asking. On the other hand my son who is 8 is more in to Wii video games and on ocations I do ask for his help witch he will do but not with the same enthusiasm that my daughter does.
But all in all I dont forse my son to do something he does not like. Maybe he'll come around.
The are to Great Kids and that is what matters to the wife and me.

 

[Highbeam]

Get them out there with you. Involve them and let them try things. Make it a a fun thing at first and then an accomplishment thing later.

I've got two daughters. The old one in these pics was 5-6 YO.

The wedling pic won us an award at the county fair. She was a proud welder.

 

[sneakyfast]

That welding one is freaking awesome!

 

[RPH]

Made my son " help" me on projects when younger, hated it and complained the whole time. Now that he's 21, he realized that the time we put in was of great benefit to him. He can look at his buddies skill level and now knows that the time spent really taught him useful skills and knowledge. He now thanks me for making him sit through all that as he is light years ahead of his peers. Hang tough and do different things to see what they like too.

 

[Roddy73]

My dad spent his youth under a hood but him and I never saw eye to eye so I learned from other guys dad's. Some of my friends wanted nothing to do with their grease monkey fathers, it happens.

The top mechanic in my high school was a girl, her dad taught her everything and she was an amazing mechanic. Whatever you get him into it has to be his, including the mistakes. Helping him fix those is where the bonding happens.

 

[milner351]

Amazing how many of us think alike. My Dad isn't a hands on guy for the most part - just basic around the house type stuff. I learned cars, welding, and machining in highschool and community college courses.

My son is 16 months old, it's too early to tell if he'll be interested or not.

I won't force him if he's not interested - but I'd be lying if I said I'm not hoping like crazy he is interested.

I already have a picture of him in the valley of the powerstroke diesel engine I rebuilt for our truck last summer -and a picture of him "checking the oil" in the lawn mower this year as I was getting it ready to cut the first time.

So far - he likes watching me cut the grass - we'll see if that turns into a desire to cut it himself one day - cuz that's a task I'm ready to hand down!

Thanks for all the suggestions - this is a great group of folks.

 

[Zeke]

There are fathers who share and fathers who just want to get the job done. My dad wasn't great at working with tools and he didn't share. Maybe he didn't feel confident, but by the time I was old enough, he had pretty much traded any tools for golf clubs.

So, now he wants me to play golf. I thought golf sucked (still do, although I'm not bad if I play). The moral is, let your kids join in on what they want and encourage anything they pick up elsewhere (good things that is).

 

[Andy Griffith]

Just go out there and work, and if he wants to come along let him. Let him help when you can, he'll make up his mind if he likes it or not.

This is key, if he likes working the shop with you great, but do not push it on him elsewise it may very well backfire on you.

I would suggest your focus be on finding something he truly enjoys and spend time doing whatever that is with him. The goal here is to spend time with him, be that working in the shop, target shooting, camping, hiking, stick and ball sports etc. It's not important what the activity is, just that you and he are spending time together.

 

[dipper]

All I can add is to just do as you do, and allow them the chance to help you along the way. I am the father of 3 boys (4.5, 2.5, & 1 yr old). My oldest loves to be in the garage with me, and gets to come out at least once per week. Sometimes they even just play out there, but it is apparent that they do like to be out there. I didn't have to do any forcing, it is just what they wanted to do; and i'm sure it is going to be like that with the 3rd one as well.

I always thought this was a great pic, the wife took it when she got home from work, it's mid october, 2007 during my garage build. Colton would have been 10 months old. I 'm gonna try to get a similar pic with my youngest Ethan using the plate tamper this weekend while working on the patio project.

 

[Morrisman]

There's no 'equal' in my garage. The daughter is there for slave labour, nothing else.

Muahahaha...

 

[flatwins]

What a great thread! I'll post later from home when I have some pics to add.

 

[EB.Bldr]

The best advice I have heard thus far is 'get them out there with you' especially at a young age. I have two boys ages 3 and 2, with a third boy due in Aug. Both of my boys are always eager to get out there with me and partake in whatever I have going on in the garage. I started my oldest off by energeticly showing him all the tools in my tool box. He didnt really understand much of what they did by I told him anyway hoping it would set in later.

I dont really have any 'memories' of being in the garage with my dad as he was a work all the time type. But I hope that my boys will have those memories. We dont have cable or game systems so spending time in front of the TV is just not a thing we do. Getting outside at all cost is our mission.

In my younger years I built some Early Broncos and had a blast doing it and will be doing another when my boys are a few years older. My approach will be to get out there and work on it and when they come and ask to help do my best to find things that are to there ability level and show paitents to keep there 5 sec attention levels tuned in. Mostly showing them the importance of patients and completing the job.

I have no plans to turn them into gear heads but fun in the garage can be a family event. And in all best interests turn the keys over to them on a surprise. Either way make it fun and they will enjoy it. Memories arent fake. There good there bad and some stick with you forever. Dont TRY to make them, that will happen on its own.

 

[Rosco]

My father was never an outdoors person or a garage guy, plus being one of eight kids it was easy to get lost in the shuffle unless you did something wrong.

My son is now 20 years old and a Marine. While he was growing up we did a lot together, hunting, fishing and rebuilding cars. The only way I could get him to maintain interest in a vehicle is to buy him one.......we purchased a 72 Chevelle SS for him(and I) to restore. He then found friends and girls..... and the Chevelle is still 50 percent done. I will not work on it without him, and it is his to do with what he wants. I will always treasure those times.

Funny thing is my 8 yr old daughter seems to be more interested in my garage than my boy was at her age. Maybe she will get to finish the Chevelle!

Two words of advice......never ask them to help you on something that you must finish in a hurry 2. Never ask them to help you on something where there is no room for error. It should be an enjoyable learning experience for them unless you are paying them by the hour.

Went fishing with my daughter last weekend. She could not keep from "checking the bait....I think I got a bite". I must have re-rigged/re-baited her pole 20 times, but enjoyed every minute of it. When we go fishing, it is about memories.....not me catching fish. BTW, she can now bait her hook, cast a good ways, and take the fish off when caught!

 

[Morrisman]

My daughter loves hanging in the garage with me, but at the moment it simply isn't big enough for her to do anything while I'm working. (we've left the garage shown above)

That will change soon and she can have her own little corner. She loves going through my toolboxes and will sand pieces of wood, drill holes with the battery drill, draw all over bits of scrap timber, and other interesting 'useful' projects.

 

[colt zantop]

great thread! I have a six month old son right now and have been wondering the same thing. I want to restore a 50's pedal car for him but Im worried hes gonna be like "dad..this is old". I want him so bad to like old vintage car stuff....antiques..etc and Im fairly young to have interest in this kind of stuff also so I just "HOPE" he likes the "old" stuff too like dad does!

 

[R Walter]

My father never spent time in a garage with me or much time otherwise; he was a career 32 year active duty Navy man. Retired from the USN at age 50; contracted back thru civil service to the Navy and died at age 64 still working for the Navy as a civilian.

As a result and certainly not his fault, my mechanic skills are a bare minimum. I can change out water pumps, themostats, do a rudimentary brake job... things like that. All of which I learned on my own.

As an adult I've always been meticulous about changing all fluids and filters on the small fleet I own. My two sons never took much interest until they got older and started to want to keep their own cars running. Then they learned to change the oil, swap out fuel pumps, and things like that.

They took it upon themselves to keep up their own vehicles throughout high school and into college years probably because they knew it would benefit them in the end.

I can't complain... 2 wonderful sons, both commisioned officers U.S. Air Force. One's a 1st Lt and the other is a 2nd Lt. Older one's a USAFA graduate with a masters from MIT in astronautical engr and the other is in med school after earning an undergraduate in chem engr. Both continue as early - mid 20 somethings to show interest in mechanics.

 

[Texas Aggie]

Here's a tip on what not to do.

If you're ever:

(1) putting a (factory style) spoiler on your '69 Camaro; while
(2) your 12 year old son is sitting on a 5 gallon bucket at least 10 feet away and
(3) you (not your son) drop the spoiler and dent one end...

Don't look at your son and say - in all seriousness - "Couldn't you have caught that?"

My dad did this to me 30 years ago, and I still give him **** about it. At the time, I didn't think it was funny, but we laugh about it now.

 

[sneakyfast]

Here's a tip on what not to do.

If you're ever:

(1) putting a (factory style) spoiler on your '69 Camaro; while
(2) your 12 year old son is sitting on a 5 gallon bucket at least 10 feet away and
(3) you (not your son) drop the spoiler and dent one end...

Don't look at your son and say - in all seriousness - "Couldn't you have caught that?"

My dad did this to me 30 years ago, and I still give him **** about it. At the time, I didn't think it was funny, but we laugh about it now.

haha...what an awesome memory.....not garage related but I had a father in law who is one of those types that rarely talks and even more rare for him to joke....anyway, he got stuck in a ditch and his son came to help get him out with his winch...unfortunately he hooked the winch to the bumper but not the frame. So it started groaning and PINGYOW the bumper flew off and almost hit them both. My father in law looked at him and said "we're going to have start pulling out bigger pieces than that out or we'll be here all day".

 

[Texas Aggie]

Forgot to mention: the part we don't laugh about is when dad sold the '69 Camaro before my 16th birthday so I never got to drive it. A 1966 Chevy II (that I still have) wasn't a bad consolation prize for my 16th birthday, though.

 

[wornoutoldman]

The important thing is to be available and patient with your child ( whatever they choose to get involved in). He/she will let you know if they have any interest in your hobbies. My son never wanted to do anything in the garage no matter how hard I tried. We do spend alot of time together doing other things (stuff that he enjoys) I hope it works out for you but don't be disappointed if your kid has other interests. It's no reflection on you.

 

[Craftsman_88]

well I remember always wanting to be with my dad. He worked weird hours and I didn't see him a whole lot. But when he was around I always wanted to spend time with him. I always admired him because he could fix anything. Not only that but I thought he was so cool with all his tools and big equipment. That was it for me. Everytime he was working around the house I would be fetching tools, holding the light, holding the wrench while he ran the ratchet. Then the time came when I was turning the ratchet, driving the screws, cutting the wood, fixing the car. Its been great memories. I was 10 and knew where every tool my dad had was. Looking back at it I think I just wanted to do what my dad did.

It wont matter what you do. Just spend time with your son. He will remember if its genuine.

 

[scott37300]

I was pretty much raised by my grandparents, both parents worked a lot and never had a garage. My dad does know some about cars but was never there to teach me. One grandpa was a farm boy that knew a little about everything and the other one was another farm boy that was a machinist for a while and also knew a little about everything. They taught me the basics of fixing things around the house and oil changes and break jobs. From there I went off learning on my own as I went, internet wasn't as full of how to articles as it is today. I broke a lot of things along the way but always learned a lot along the way. One of my first "learning experiences" was I bought a jet ski when I was 16. Over winter I was bored and decided to tear the motor apart, nothing wrong with it but I was just bored! Put it all back together and it fired up. Took it out for the first time that summer and ran great for about an hour, then I heard a weird noise. Found out that you can't reuse circlips for the piston pins! It came out and tore apart the whole block, head, piston, and lots more. Couple hundred dollars later I put it back together with a new jug, head, piston kit, etc.

Try and get your kids in the garage and just teach them the basics, they will learn the rest as they go. Teach them safety and how to use tools and do certain jobs and if they want to learn they will as they go.

 

[Tool Time]

I am one not to interject many comments, but more so one to read and learn from those who do. This post parallels my younger years where I feel like need to share. I grew up in a household many of you may have enjoyed; my father was a mechanic from the time I was born until this day at the age of 78.

My mother gave me a photo of me when I was about 5 years old holding a wrench for my dad as he repairs one of the many wrecked cars he drug home during my life time. This was only a hobby for him but he felt it was my hobby as well. Unfortunately, I did not have those same feelings, while all my school mates were playing sports I was required to participate in our hobby.

The truth being I would much rather been involved in my school activities than hooking chains and jacks up to twitched frames. I was the only kid who had their own bear frame rack in their garage.

Although I did not agree with his philosophy then and even to this day I have questioned if I had not missed out on too many of my teen years, but I gained skills many of my friends don’t have. I have no fear to dive into repairs of any type, mechanical or other and I have received much praise of my accomplishments, and without any doubt would not have occurred without all the hours I spent in our workshop garage. I have become successful in my life due to these skills. For that I must thank my father who taught most of what I know today.

Just recently my daughter had a fender bender where she hit the back of another driver going 10 MPH, only causing a little damage to her car. No hood damage but the bumper needed replaced, the evaporator had a pinhole and some grill work was required. The radiator support was damage and I would have replaced it instead of repair. After three weeks of backorder and still no signs of delivery I decided to take a shot at repairing the support. I also thought this would be a good experience for my daughter to help with the repairs to understand tailgating is not a good thing. Only a short time into the repair I had the bright idea for my daughter invite grandpa for a bonding moment and I had banged on the support to the best of my ability without getting it to where it needed to be.

Within minutes my father was in the door walking straight by me with the sternest glare I had seen in many years reaching for hammer and barking out requests for different tools. In one brief moment he dropped that first wrench onto the garage floor, making that forever remembrances sound of the wrench hitting the floor creating the largest smile to breakout on my face, with a flashbacks of my teen years. Within minutes the support was reinstalled and hood was again operational, even at 78 and me at 52 my father is still the teacher.

One last thing that has stuck in my mind for ever, once while working in our garage I complained I was tired of working hard and not smart; my father snapped back, “all the hard work” was done long before you were born. I knew exactly what he meant then and I remember that everyday.

In my case finding the correct balance of work and school probably would have had been better, but I have no complains.

 

[cdenton]

If you enjoy being in the garage and working and you are willing to teach and inform then you will have the best chance at your kids wanting to learn. The key is happiness and being a person that your children genuinely want to be with. Ultimately kids gravitate to things they are interested in and the best you can do is make it interesting to them. If they are not then you need to be interested in what they are.

 

[nmanitou]

My step dad was a big influence, but it was a more laid back approach. I've tried to use the same attitude with my son, now 21. He didn't catch the bug as early as I did, but he is getting it in the last few years. Consider these guidelines:

1. Invite, don't require, their participation.

2. Repeat the invitations even if they don't join in right away.

3. If they do join - give them something meaningful to do - not just holding the trouble light. The tasks are age and skill dependent, but it needs to be hands on.

4. Include an activity that is important to your child. Don't just work on "your" car - the kid probably has no attachment to the car. What worked for me was the ability to work on my first 50 cc Suzuki motorcycle. It was a project that mattered to me, so I "wanted" to learn how to tighten the chain, fix a flat, repair a brake handle...

5. Patience! They will screw up. They will break/lose a tool. They will make you cuss! Stay cool, keep smiling, remember why you are spending time together.

Bottom line - it is worth the effort. It matters!

 

[UncleJoe]

For starters let me say that I have the best father in the world. I know some of you guys think you might have the best dad, but really, just give it up.

When I was little he was always in the shop. After work he would come home, eat dinner and go to his garage/shop. On the weekends he was there from 6 am till ...... I have no idea how he had time to coach my baseball team, watch every football practice, pick me up from wrestling practice and still be the president of a company with 6,000 employees and offices in 14 countries.

He built things, cool things, he built things for the family and for me and my brother and sister. He built 5 sailboats that we would take to the lake and sail in when I was a kid.

When I was about 5, I had a fascination with Pirates, so we went to the shop and he cut a pirate sword out of 1/4 plywood and we made a handle together and he helped me paint it. All the kids in the neighborhood were so jealous. After that I was hooked on making things with him.

He made toy guns for cowboys and Indians, and things like that. It was cool.

When I was 9 my older brother blew the engine on our old 1960ish VW beetle. Dad said he was going to rebuild the engine and he "needed" my help. He had me do most of the work. He must have had real patience to wait while I used a ratchet to take off bolts and stuff. You know 9 year old just don't know how to use tools by instinct. He could have just done the whole thing in a weekend but he took the time and showed me how things worked and gave me simple easy to understand explanations of what was happening. I can still remember my disbelief when he explained that an explosion occurs which makes the piston move. As a 9 year old how cool is it to be working on something that makes 1,000's of explosions.

I have great memories of restoring a 1953 MGTD in the 1972-1975 years. We lived in Pittsburgh and we would be in the shop every evening with sports radio on, Myron Cope on Sports, for all the Stiller fans.

If you are interested in him, he will want to be with you. My dad read to me at night and made me read. I can remember at 9 or 10 years old sitting on his lap and I would read a page of "Call of the Wild" and he would read a page. Good stuff going on there.

Dad is 83 now and we talk twice a day and I see him at 3 times a week at least. If you are there with your son when he is young he will cherish the time when he is old enough.

I do see some guys that get so busy with their cool projects that they tend to put family second. That can lead to problems.

Good luck and enjoy your family time it is the best.

 

[Beaumont67]

My Dad drove heavy truck for 40 years (without a accident) and operated a 100 acre farm (beef and pigs) with my moms help and my twin brother and I.
He was not mechanically inclined (only did oil change like stuff) and worked long hours.

I fell in love with cars at about 15 and did my first flip a few years later / bought a '49 Fargo van for $150 and sold it for $350. Painted my first car at 17 after 2 months of welding sheetmetal and bondo refinishing, in the farm garage. (self taught and I soon got my brother into the auto body hobby)
- I liked the garage out of necessity as I didn't have money to just buy a nice car / instead I fixed up a rust beater and drove it for a few years

Suggest:
Find an old red wagon or riding mower to fix up, with your child / to build the fun and bonding. My son liked travelling sports and video games and not any of my garage stuff. But now he co-owns his own digital marketing company in his late 20's. We bonded through baseball and billiard sports and not wrenching on vehicles. He likes fine cars but not getting his hands dirty, and that's the way his career headed in IT.
- when his vehicle breaks down now, he just phones his Dad to help out or use one of my good mechanics / a month ago his room mates battery died and she called me, before her own father...I took over the tools and let her do all the work changing it out with my instruction & teesing...she loved the help and money saved / I liked being needed and appreciated by my sons close friends

 

[Steve from Socal]

I was always curious about how things worked from a very early age. My parents were older than most at the time and my dad was an Air Force pilot back when the pay wasn't so great! Anyway; dad was thrifty, that meant he bought stuff that needed work so I learned at an early age. The really sublime learning came when I was 7-8 and I got a Honda Mini-Trail used of course. It almost ran when we got it. That progressed to a series of bultaco's and finally cars. The secret was they almost ran; nothing primes a kid for learning like a new toy. Now it takes a certain type to feel comfortable with this but it is a great way to build interest and bond with your kids.

Steve

 

[Kevin54]

Most of my memories of my dad have been with the garage. He always told me that when I was a baby, he would come home from work, put me in a playpen out in the garage, while he mixed and poured the concrete floor. When I was older I got to hold the flashlight for him when he worked on cars. This is where I learned the names of the different things under the hood. At 13 he taught me to paint my first car. Dad was a painter and body man specializing in lead work at Miller-Meteor (Hearses and Ambulances) He also taught me how to work with lead. Him and I did many a car together in a small 22'x30' garage. Sometimes 2 a week. Whe I got married I tried to get my son involved in working on cars, which he still does to this day. (he's now 36) So a garage has always been part of my life and I have many fond memories.

 

[chevy2]

Ok guys here are a few pics of my helper <center>
<a href="http://s190.photobucket.com/albums/z235/Madhatter68/?action=view&current=Camaro078.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i190.photobucket.com/albums/z235/Madhatter68/th_Camaro078.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket" ></a>
<a href="http://s190.photobucket.com/albums/z235/Madhatter68/?action=view&current=Wylie074.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i190.photobucket.com/albums/z235/Madhatter68/th_Wylie074.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket" ></a>
</center> Don't be afraid to look at some of the other pics. of the car rebuild either .

 

[Bevis]

My nephew used to come out to the barn with my wife, he'd want in the Jeeps, on the mower. Noiw that he is older, he will walk out there if he knows I'm there, just to hang out. His lil brother is now doing the same thing as he did, and my wife made a comment about it too.

 

[Corins]

I wish I had some of the memories you guys had, maybe me and my dad would get along better, instead of the constant arguing we do now.

My dad was the type that worked all the time when I was younger, and didn't know how to use a tool to save his life, he just paid people to do everything for him, plus on top of all that he had little to no patients. Today he is 60 and still wouldn't be able to change his own oil. I had to learn everything on my own, I still haven't tackled any major projects yet. Biggest I have done is a lift kit on a truck or exhaust on a car, however some day I would like to restore an old car. Ever since I started doing my own work either on my vehicles, electrical/plumbing/carpentry on my house, I get calls from my dad for the simplest things that he needs me to do. While he won't come out and say it from the start, if I don't show up at his house and have said project done for him by a certain date he will be upset with me.

About a month ago he wanted a hand with something (read wanted me to do something for him), and I had to work 222 hours over a 14 day period, I was a bit late getting to it and when I did finish it, I got a comment of wish I had this done 2 weeks ago. That starts an argument between us, because not only do I have a full time job, but he wants me to do jobs for him as well, plus if he shows up at my place he complains that I don't have this done yet or that done yet with my own place.

Whatever you do spending time with your child and having patients with them is going to be the key. When my dad finally tried to spend time with me it was being my coach in hockey or baseball, where he would bench me for doing the same things everyone else would do just because he didn't want anyone to think he was playing favorites with his own son.

With all that said, I don't hate my father, however we don't get along as well as I would like and I think if he had been more patient and gotten less angry at me over the years, maybe things could be better now. My life is pretty good, however even though I willing share the blame, all the yelling I got over the years growing up I'm sure has affected my relationships with other people.

 

[chammyman]

I have 2 daughters, oldest is 2.5 and the youngest 1.5. Last year the oldest took a fancy to what I was doing. So she 'helps me' when its ok for her to do so.

In fact the first time she sat with me she grabbed a spanner and started to hit the motorbike I was working on (my bike i was pulling an engine out of so it was ok) I sent the mrs away to get her a plastic tool kit. Which she helps me with.

however her and her younger sister have figured out the plastic hammer is great for hitting each other with and anything else. lol

Even if my daughters have no interest I will teach them some things like I did with my mum and sister to allow them to get on and can get themselves out of a pickle or so they can see when they are getting ripped off.

My dad was never about, when he was he tried to force model aeroplanes etc onto me. I hated it. I was forced to do it even won an award or 2. They minute my mum and us left him I never touched another toy plane or helicopter again.

 

[sberry]

I work the **** out of the kid.