Paying the price for helping neighbor

[gtsgarage]

My neighbor who I am friends with, botched a gate latch install. He be oke the new bolts in the fence post, using an 18” crescent wrench. Due to the layout of the latch and fence it’s become a complete cluster. I’ve spend two hours on it already and I want nothing to do with it.

I came up with a genius plan but used old bolts and they snapped. Was too lazy to go get new bolts.

Had to send him to get some better lag bolts but this just *****.

Need to learn to say no. I am skipping my own projects right now and missing football!

And while I think I’ve been A+ in my repairs he probably thinks I messed it up more.

 

[Bent Handle]

The beers required for the job sounds like it’s going up!

 

[nadogail]

"No Good Deed Will Go Unpunished"

 

[gtsgarage]

All done! Worked great and life is good again

 

[bob15]

Honestly, you kinda sound a little selfish. You choose the old bolts and they snapped, so that is on you not the neighbor. And then you say you're missing football and your own projects. Which is it, football or projects? And, is missing a bit of football or a project really that big a deal? What happens when you need help?

 

[gtsgarage]

Honestly, you kinda sound a little selfish. You choose the old bolts and they snapped, so that is on you not the neighbor. And then you say you're missing football and your own projects. Which is it, football or projects? And, is missing a bit of football or a project really that big a deal? What happens when you need help?

Thanks I can see you point.

Sorry if it came across that way.

 

[Lassen Forge]

Moral of the story?

Help your neighbor because it's a lot more entertaining to us than hearing about your football game you missed!

 

[Bent Handle]

We’ve all been there when something simple turns into more work than anticipated. I’m sure your neighbor appreciates your efforts. Carry on.

 

[tarmy]

I helped a new neighbor that was having trouble installing some shear wall in his basement...I showed him mine and how to do it. I ended up helping him put a bunch in correctly.

Turns out this ahole pissed on all the neighbors before he got to me...and then called code compliance on me for a shed I had built without permits because I didn’t help him finish his job that day. Cost me 1500 bucks to tear down and rebuild with permits (originally built 25 years ago).

We don’t talk anymore.

Sorry about your hassle OP...sound like you got out easy...

 

[AZ Pete]

jeez, 25 year old shed....what is the statute of limitations on a code violation? Not to worry about your neighbor, he has to live with himself, and I suspect he is a very unhappy person.

 

[PugetDude]

I helped a new neighbor that was having trouble installing some shear wall in his basement...I showed him mine and how to do it. I ended up helping him put a bunch in correctly.

Turns out this ahole pissed on all the neighbors before he got to me...and then called code compliance on me for a shed I had built without permits because I didn’t help him finish his job that day. Cost me 1500 bucks to tear down and rebuild with permits (originally built 25 years ago).

We don’t talk anymore.

Sorry about your hassle OP...sound like you got out easy...

Bang his wife.

 

[TractorJeff]

How did he find out that the Shed was built without a Permit?
Someone tell him?

 

[dkroth]

All done! Worked great and life is good again

Bang his wife.

Sounds like GTS got to bang someone's wife!







.

 

[tarmy]

How did he find out that the Shed was built without a Permit?
Someone tell him?

Well, turns out here in Commiefornia...you are guilty until proven innocent. The city had transfered to all electronic media about 20ish years ago...and if YOU can’t provide proof...then it does NOT, by definition, have permits.

Stupid rule...that doesn’t affect the main house...only outbuildings. The laws is this state actually give the city the rights to fine you if you obstruct the inspection. It also give them the right to get a court order to enter you property without your permission.

Funny part is...I know most everybody at the city as I was a entitlement guy for a lot of home builders in the area. So my buddies in Code Compliance may have told me who filed the complaint...they are not supposed to do that.

He and his wife actually came over after they red tagged the structure because his wife had heard about the issue (she is a very nice lady who I like and is in an “arranged” marriage from the old country).

He, of course lies and said it wasn’t him. I indicated, without throwing my buddies at the city under the bus, that I knew it was him. He lied to me again...and tells his wife that he did not do it. She knew he did...and so did I.

 

[tarmy]

Bang his wife.

I am to damn old for the grief...not from my wife(of 40 years) but from the stress on my heart from taking care of TWO womenz in the hood.

 

[didit]

Consider it an act of 'paying it forward' for the betterment of mankind. It doesn't even matter if your neighbor ever reciprocates the favor or not. You can sleep better now knowing you done good.

 

[homebuilt burner]

I used to have great neighbors. Two or three of them were diy guys and we borrowed tools back and forth. They have moved away and passed away.

I wish I had neighbors that were friends.

 

[toolin' around]

Sad when you get neighbors like that... I will always go out of my way to help out a neighbor (and my wife is the same)... most of the time it builds great relationships, but occasionally it backfires, and you find A-holes like that. He doesn’t feel an ounce of guilt... he’s just a jerk.

I end up being the “go to guy” for the complicated projects. It’s tough sometimes when you end up spending a full day helping out a neighbor... but I know they wouldn’t hesitate to help me out if I asked, even if it all they could contribute was some basic labor. (Of course, I rarely ask because I’m so stubborn and will figure a way to do it solo, but I know they would if I did!)

We reap what we sow... and most of the time I find myself reaping some pretty solid friendships, if nothing else!

 

[joey1320]

You helped someone.
Nothing to be upset about.

 

[gtsgarage]

The whole family just brought over a fresh baked pan of brownies! Ok, ok I was whining while he went to get the bolts. It’s nice to be helpful. I am
Now overcome with the Christmas spirit.

 

[didit]

That's great! I once had a neighbor who was also a higher up at my place of employment. It seemed I became his 'go to guy' every time something came up. It got to the point that he was giving me orders instead of asking for favors. The last time he did this, it was in regards to his son's mini-bike that they couldn't start. He dropped it off to my wife when I wasn't home and asked to tell me to fix it. He got it back in boxes. I took every piece apart that came apart. He moved away, I transferred at work and have since learned who is an abuser/user and also learned to control my devious tendencies.

 

[karoc]

The whole family just brought over a fresh baked pan of brownies! Ok, ok I was whining while he went to get the bolts. It’s nice to be helpful. I am
Now overcome with the Christmas spirit.

Good to hear, and had a happy ending.

 

[Lassen Forge]

What they didn't let you know was what they put in the brownies...

Anyway, what an awesome ending!

 

[bobg03]

Bang his wife.

Screw that, shoot him in the ****...

 

[LB-1911]

The whole family just brought over a fresh baked pan of brownies! Ok, ok I was whining while he went to get the bolts. It’s nice to be helpful. I am
Now overcome with the Christmas spirit.

^ better than a check for beer $$'s.

 

[dkroth]

Bang his wife.

... and had a happy ending.

Well, OK. Next best thing.







.

 

[bob15]

The whole family just brought over a fresh baked pan of brownies! Ok, ok I was whining while he went to get the bolts. It’s nice to be helpful. I am
Now overcome with the Christmas spirit.

See, it was worth helping him......

 

[mikegt4]

I just finished digging out some stumps with my track loader for my neighbor, last year I cleaned out about a half acre of scrub and sticker bushes for him. This summer I machined some brackets to hold the axle on his Bush Hog zero turn after it broke loose. His mechanical ability ends at operating a retractable ball point pen. He is most appreciative and always offers compensation usually involving food and drink.

The person that lived there before wanted to start a HOA (with him in charge) and constantly complained to me, the neighbors and the county when people didn't do things to his liking. This is out in the country, cornfields, livestock, horses, 4 wheelers, target shooting and acreage. I am happy to have good neighbors even if I have become the "go to" guy.

 

[bigtiger]

Lol..our workplace has this hottie divorced single mom 2 kids and all the guys are lining up to offer her help, me included . Lol.. But I think she's attracted to the bad type guys, reason why she's divorced.

Sent from my SM-N960U using Tapatalk

 

[SuperCat]

Karma never sleeps.
But you can rest easy, you did the right thing and some day it will come back to you.

 

[Retroman]

Are we talking about a mounting a gate latch? Let me get this straight you both broke lag bolts going into wood him the new ones and you the old one's all of the bolts? Then you come up with an ingenious plan to make it work?
And the whole ingenious plan is put into action/completed and you have posted twice in less than an hour along with him making a trip to a hardware store.

I would like to know what kind of wood the gate is and how many people have an 18" Crescent wrench lying around. I have a 15" from when I was in construction not sure I have ever used it at my house. And your neighbor who can't install a gate latch has one and snapped new steel bolts screwing lags into wood?

 

[OptionalStop]

please delete post

 

[gtsgarage]

Are we talking about a mounting a gate latch? Let me get this straight you both broke lag bolts going into wood him the new ones and you the old one's all of the bolts? Then you come up with an ingenious plan to make it work?
And the whole ingenious plan is put into action/completed and you have posted twice in less than an hour along with him making a trip to a hardware store.

I would like to know what kind of wood the gate is and how many people have an 18" Crescent wrench lying around. I have a 15" from when I was in construction not sure I have ever used it at my house. And your neighbor who can't install a gate latch has one and snapped new steel bolts screwing lags into wood?

Yup I admit I was the idiot for reusing the older bolts I know better. I thought drilling a nice pilot would save me.

It’s all good. What took so much work was trying to remove the old bolts from the post without it looking like a hack job.

Anyway I’ve already agreed I was whining.

The whole story is the latch was installed and it was literally the last turn when the bolt snapped. I was so close to walk away. The second bolt snapped on removal. Blah, blah, blah.

I blew it and then posted here about it to feel better. It didn’t work either.

Have a great holiday gentlemen.

 

[LeonardY]

I had a long post of stuff like this. Backspaced the whole thing.

I boiled it down to this.

If I help, I don't expect anything in return. I don't worry about the time. Sometimes I get a beer, cookies or a BBQ dinner. I appreciate that.

It takes the stress out of helping.

I've also learned to politely say no.

Merry Christmas

 

[LeonardY]

I blew it and then posted here about it to feel better. It didn’t work either.

Been there, done that.

Occasionally, you need to get a read on the meter. This is a better way than fuming at the situation.

Enjoy your holiday!

 

[JasonMcElroy]

I like opportunities to help my neighbors. It's a great way to get to know someone and to be appreciated for some skill you may possess that they may not. When they (or others) reciprocate with their talents, we all benefit.

That said, if I offer to help or take on a job, I am making a commitment to see it through no matter how it goes. Sometimes it turns into a CF, sometimes a ten minute job. That's the way of the game.

Take on the perspective of the person being helped . . . they don't know how to fix a problem. They might be worried about how it's going to work out. Someone helps and gets into the middle of the job and things go haywire. Stress increases. If you bail out at that point, you've made their problem worse.

"First do no harm" applies here?

Anyway, my ramblings.

Jason

 

[tarmy]

I like opportunities to help my neighbors. It's a great way to get to know someone and to be appreciated for some skill you may possess that they may not. When they (or others) reciprocate with their talents, we all benefit.

That said, if I offer to help or take on a job, I am making a commitment to see it through no matter how it goes. Sometimes it turns into a CF, sometimes a ten minute job. That's the way of the game.

Take on the perspective of the person being helped . . . they don't know how to fix a problem. They might be worried about how it's going to work out. Someone helps and gets into the middle of the job and things go haywire. Stress increases. If you bail out at that point, you've made their problem worse.

"First do no harm" applies here?

Anyway, my ramblings.

Jason

Hey, you are only about 15 miles from me...I wanna introduce you to my favorite neighbor...he has some things he needs help with.

 

[Retroman]

Yup I admit I was the idiot for reusing the older bolts I know better. I thought drilling a nice pilot would save me.

It’s all good. What took so much work was trying to remove the old bolts from the post without it looking like a hack job.

Anyway I’ve already agreed I was whining.

The whole story is the latch was installed and it was literally the last turn when the bolt snapped. I was so close to walk away. The second bolt snapped on removal. Blah, blah, blah.

I blew it and then posted here about it to feel better. It didn’t work either.

Have a great holiday gentlemen.

Oh OK that clears things up, I know how it is when a simple job goes wrong and it is usally when your helping out somebody else.

 

[driftpin]

I've used a wire-feed welder to attach a piece of short metal onto a snapped-off lag bolt buried into a 4" X 8" board. I use a scrap piece of metal with a hole drilled into it the dia. of the lag bolt. Weld it up, use a crescent wrench to turn the lag bolt out.

I would only agree to assist a neighbor I knew not to be a problem. I've declined, 'too-busy,' or simply, "sorry, I cannot help you." Nothing-else need-be said.

 

[Just Fishing]

I tried to help a neighbor with his Deere riding mower, had a lean pulse when running high idle and no load.
I ended up breaking a screw on it, me feeling terrible i spent a good $50 out of my pocket to fix it and to fix his lean pulsing issue while i was at it.

I refused to take any money from him, telling him "no good deed goes unpunished"