Grunge Garage

[49stude2r6]

Keep trucking, we are all pulling for you. Reading some of the advice from others and seeing the pictures has been an inspiration to me.

 

[couchmechanic]

I think your local Health Dept probably has more things to do than people to do them. As long as you are making progress I doubt that any individual with half a brain would fault you. I am pretty sure that includes most govermental departments. Keep at it! Your one heck of a man in my book!

 

[Kevin54]

GUILT AND SHAME.....and FEAR

We humans are social animals and when you are living outside of your society's norms you try to hide it, both from others and from yourselves. It's amazing what the human mind can ignore and accept. My wife now knows about this thread but won't read or participate in it as she is a very private individual. She implored me this holiday NOT to let you all know the true extent of our situation, as there is a lot more than a messy garage, as I have hinted at before in the thread. Suffice it to say, for now, that there is a lot more to show you later. Can't show it yet, until we are ready to quickly remedy things. We don't want the health department in here.

That relates to my determination to change and fix this mess and learn a new way to live. It is at a point where I must either change or have dire consequences that I don't want. I really only have one choice. Either I use my time and energy to change things, or they will eventually be changed for me. I see parallels in people who hoard animals and are only discovered when things go so far beyond the pale that they are forced to go public by neighbors, local government and the media. A lot of them lose their homes and some are even demolished.
And I should want better for myself! And I do! The difference is that now I think it is possible.
I now have a beginning. I can't look without seeing. I can also see where I am going.
Well, on with the tasks........

Sometimes more stuff is just too much!

Good for you Bill and Good for the wifey, that you DO realize there is some sort of problem and you are both working towards remedying it. Kudos!!!

Like JC23 says "One bite at a time"

Get with the wife, make up a game plan for the day and hit it hard. Once you have your game plan made, don't alter from it. If you say you are going to toss, put the blinders on, don't look around, but toss. Same for the wife. Move forward and don't move back. Set a goal for the 8 hour day. Get one room cleaned out completely, items tossed, then both go out for a nice dinner afterwards as a reward. Make piles as to what can go where. This pile goes to the ReStore, this pile goes to The Salvation Army, this pile goes to the curb for trash day, so on and so forth. Then try you best to hit those goals everyday. Set a timeframe as to when you want it all completed. Something like New Years day would be realistic. Then stick to it. Don't get up and look at it and say "I'll do that tomorrow" Hit it head on full force. Pretty soon that elephant will be down to one bite left and you guys will have your normal lives back.

Everyone on here is pulling for you guys

 

[bczygan]

Kevin and all......thank you for your continued support.
Yesterday I accomplished next to nothing, despite my initial intentions to write a list and start. It all seems too much. Hard to fight the despair without the incentive of a pending vacation. Maybe I can use the impending winter season. It is getting much colder and I have to get a move on before snow and ice stops things. My list was too big. I'm going to have to narrow my focus and dig deep and get myself a new beginning today. I am going to have to restart by taking very small steps.
Let's start with one item and I'll mark it done and then put down another.
1. Sort out trash items from pile in living room (Paper and cardboard and ruined things from rat and mouse poop). Today the dumpster is out so it's an opportunity to reduce the pile. Make the living room even more accessible, even though the fridge is in there. Give myself some really decent working room. Not ready to take everything to the appropriate rooms yet as they don't have any space yet. I'm trying to hype myself and talk myself into it again. Maybe the incentive of having a TV down there again after these many years would help.
Well, time to go and see if I can peck away at it and make a satisfying dent....

Note to self: There is a price to pay in time and effort to rectify the hoarder mode of living. I'm paying the price right now. How much more wonderful to spend time daily to simply maintain a nice place, rather than working in a rat hole just trying to make it livable. Another price is the money and time and effort spent to acquire all this junk. That all could have been resources spent elsewhere. It is a good part of the reason we have a crushing credit card debt. I don't even know how much. At least 20K. Probably a lot more. Time for a change in the way of living.
I have to remember I am not alone. Lady down the street had 3' of trash on all her floors when she left. Saw it myself as I went to trash pick. One good thing about the foreclosure crisis was that people like her who lost her home were forced to abandon all their trash. Ironic. Not the method I want to use, but sure seems easier. This home is all the security I have. I intend to try to hang on to it.

 

[2fat2fly]

Well, time to go and see if I can peck away at it and make a satisfying dent....

Even the smallest dent in it is still forward progress.

 

[JC23]

Maybe giving yourselves little incentives along the way can be your 'vacation motivation.' The first thing they teach in finance control - which is essentially the same thing you are doing - is to 'pay yourself first.' By that, they say to put a little something away for yourself as a reward and to reduce the feeling that's it's all about the task.

In your case (and mine, too) keep your incentive as a trip or function rather than an object - for obvious reasons. Say to yourself, "If I get this room done, really done and done right," it's a night out on the town or a weekend trip to a place you've never been. The idea here being working towards a goal with a bit of a break in between.

And when you get overwhelmed, just think about doing only three things on the list, stopping for a break, then going back for three more.

Part of this is cleaning up your mind, too. I believe you said something to that effect. About not thinking the way you have in the past any more. You already know it's not easy. But you already know you have results.

You're going to have setbacks. You're going to have times when it seems too much. Think about what you have done just as much as what you have to do. It's about keeping things in balance.

Hope this helps and yes, we are pulling for ya, Bill! (Check out how many people have seen this thread.)

 

[bczygan]

maybe giving yourselves little incentives along the way can be your 'vacation motivation.' the first thing they teach in finance control - which is essentially the same thing you are doing - is to 'pay yourself first.' by that, they say to put a little something away for yourself as a reward and to reduce the feeling that's it's all about the task.

In your case (and mine, too) keep your incentive as a trip or function rather than an object - for obvious reasons. Say to yourself, "if i get this room done, really done and done right," it's a night out on the town or a weekend trip to a place you've never been. The idea here being working towards a goal with a bit of a break in between.

And when you get overwhelmed, just think about doing only three things on the list, stopping for a break, then going back for three more.

Part of this is cleaning up your mind, too. I believe you said something to that effect. About not thinking the way you have in the past any more. You already know it's not easy. But you already know you have results.

You're going to have setbacks. You're going to have times when it seems too much. Think about what you have done just as much as what you have to do. It's about keeping things in balance.

hope this helps and yes, we are pulling for ya, bill! (check out how many people have seen this thread.)

it really does!!!

 

[Grandad]

Bill, My real name is Jim, and I’ve been lurking on this thread from the start.
You’ve taken me on a trip that I find I cannot get off. I'll still be here at the finish. I promise you that.
I can’t pretend to think I have any real first hand knowledge of what you’ve been through or are going through now, although my first MIL could legitimately be called a hoarder and I’ve been involved in trying to help animal (dog) hoarders, neither of these things legitimizes any claim that I truly understand exactly what it is like.
Seeing it, is not the same as understanding it.

But your honest and open accounting of your journey is helping me greatly to understand a bit better, and therefore is perhaps helping others to understand the phenomena we call “hoarding” and I know at least in my case any judgmental attitude I may have held in the past disappeared around page 5 or so and was replaced with deep seated respect..

Bill, I’m writing this from about as far from you as it is possible to do. Literally on the other side of the globe, but there are times I feel so close to you that I feel I could reach out and touch your shoulder and quietly say, “Could you use a hand there mate?”
I think my offer would no doubt be answered by a refusal, that this is something you must do yourself.

The one thing that is standing out to me, is that this change has not been forced upon you from an outside force. You have gone through a process of having your eyes opened all on your own. Because of this, despite having times when you must by virtue of you being a mere human have times when you are discouraged by the magnitude of what you are doing, I just cannot see you ever allowing the transformation to cease.

Be gentle on your wife. You've got a head start on her. We all travel at different speeds, but it sounds like she's starting on the same journey as you. Show her the possibility, and I'm confident she be along side you at the end.

You have an expression in your country, that I find quite commendable. You are an AmeriCAN, not an AmeriCAN’T. I like that expression.

But here in Oz, we’d say “Good onya mate! You’ll be right. Just keep pushing on”

 

[bczygan]

OK, got a start. A couple of boxes in the trash before the truck came and a couple more ready to go. Just need to begin, and keep on beginning. Sorting out kitchen items, tools, drafting equipment, camping gear, paintings and decorative items out from the pile on the couch. There is a dishwasher in there somewhere. We cleaned up a really bad pile in front of the french door before the trip. Threw out a broken fish tank and stand. There was a self feed mechanism for a Do-All metal band saw in there. Anyone need one? Before and progress photos:

First 2 are existing mess on the entry table and couch and fireplace end of the living room. Next is the other side of the entry vestibule and the stair to upstairs. The last 2 are the already sorted area looking towards the kitchen. Note that this room is already half cleaned up and neatly organized. By that I mean things are sorted and stacked, not that it is as it should be. Lots to still get rid of or put where it belongs. Last photo is today's beginning progress on that couch pile.

The blame game
Before I began this project my wife and I played the blame game. She works and I don't. So in her mind (And also mine), I am responsible for the house, yard, cooking and all things not related to work or finances. So all this mess is my fault. Every time I told her to help me we argued and ended up with an impasse that resulted in neither of us doing anything. We quit being a team. After a while I didn't want to face it, argue about it or deal with it. She could do the same. We could both go along imagining buying and moving into great places. We could ignore the reality and dream an impossible dream. Unless you have the means, it's not really possible to buy yourselves out of this kind of problem. One way we tried to buy our way out is buying storage bins. We have a bedroom full of Rubbermaid bins full of old clothes. Haven't been able to even get in that room for years. Clothes are security for her like tools and materials are for me. The clothes ruined outside I have been able to reassure her that they can be replaced as the resale shops have lots more. I will use that excuse to dispose of most of what's in those bins.

 

[BigWil]

Bill, keep it up. Everyone else posted the advice I was going to give, so I'll stick with encouragement. It didn't get that way in a week, so you can't expect to clean it up in a week. If you treat the cleanup as your "job", you should have no problem getting the main floor in good enough condition to have Christmas or New Year's at your place this year.

 

[bczygan]

Another full dumpster. I'm in the middle of the living room and it's much worse than the photos showed. Photos later.

I do have a number of comforts besides the satisfaction of the work. I have the support of you folks at GJ, the love of my wife (No matter what), and whenever I come upstairs to post, a small male Spinx cat who jumps up on my chest, blocking the screen and rubs my chin while purring with his whole body. Spinx cats are the hairless big eared cats who feel like a warm chamois and are very lovable.
He looks similar to this:

 

[rickairmedic]

Bill your plight has encouraged me to finaly attack my garage and actually toss things that have needed tossing for years . I started my garage renovation several years ago but have always been hindered by the things I couldnt toss out " The things I might be able to use someday ". Since you have started this thread I have actually filled 3 toters with stuff that might have been useable at somke point but I realised that I could always go buy it again when and if I really needed it easier than I could store it for future use . I know although only slightly what you are facing as I have looked at this garage for years and thought it was just overwhelming . You and I are making progress . The one suggestion I can give you is this didnt happen in a week it took much longer to get where you are today and it is going to take more than a week to fix it . The way I have been attacking my garage is one wall at a time . This might work for you as well. Plan to do one room a week and attack that room one wall at a time this seems to make the project much less overwhelming to me at least. The plus that you have over me is many more toters( dumpsters ) . I have 2 of them and must leave most of one of them for household garbage every week . I still have one major area to attack and that is the loft above my stairs which I need to get before pictures of for my thread and then dive into it as a good portion of it will be heading for the toters simply due to smoke and heat damage from the fire being so close to that area .


Rick

 

[bczygan]

Bill your plight has encouraged me to finaly attack my garage and actually toss things that have needed tossing for years . I started my garage renovation several years ago but have always been hindered by the things I couldnt toss out " The things I might be able to use someday ". Since you have started this thread I have actually filled 3 toters with stuff that might have been useable at somke point but I realised that I could always go buy it again when and if I really needed it easier than I could store it for future use . I know although only slightly what you are facing as I have looked at this garage for years and thought it was just overwhelming . You and I are making progress . The one suggestion I can give you is this didnt happen in a week it took much longer to get where you are today and it is going to take more than a week to fix it . The way I have been attacking my garage is one wall at a time . This might work for you as well. Plan to do one room a week and attack that room one wall at a time this seems to make the project much less overwhelming to me at least.


Rick

Thanks Rick,
Your encouragement has helped me, and it is very satisfying to think my story has helped anyone else recognize their plight or take action for themselves.
I am trying to match the days or hours attempt to the ability I feel. This morning I felt a little hopeless so I came here to get a cup of courage from you guys and it really helped. Once you get started it is easier to continue and do more than you thought you would. Setting goals too high or looking too far forward makes the mountain too big and you don't want to even start. Better to pick one thing and do it, and then pick another. Notice I don't have a big list today. Maybe as the living room gets cut down to size I will make a finish it up check list. But this is all just clean out the **** work. Sorting through and finding and tossing the garbage or ruined things. The next step will be harder. Deciding what usable things to part with by sale or donation.
Got to get back to it or I won't feel satisfied with myself when Julie gets home at 4...

Thanks guys!

 

[Omphaloskeptic]

Bill, once again, kudos to you for what you are posting AND for what you have accomplished to this date!

Back in my original post (#174), I suggested a very useful site that I hope will become a reference and resource tool which you will use daily:
http://www.ocfoundation.org/hoarding/

The reason I bring this up again is because of what you wrote in a recent post - (#244)
"Another price is the money and time and effort spent to acquire all this junk. That all could have been resources spent elsewhere. It is a good part of the reason we have a crushing credit card debt. I don't even know how much. At least 20K. Probably a lot more. Time for a change in the way of living."
I'm no psychologist but you may have hit the nail on the head as to the root cause of your hoarding; control over your finances! Please, do yourselves a favor and get some help to discover and resolve those issues, whatever they may be.
I hope you continue to post your progress here on GJ, but also participate in a forum which targets not only the symptom (HOARDING), but also the true causative problems which foster and force the symptom. Until you start addressing those driving issues, you may not be able to 'see the forest for the trees'. Good Luck with your work on the symptom, and in finding a cure for the disorder.

 

[bczygan]

Good for you Bill and Good for the wifey, that you DO realize there is some sort of problem and you are both working towards remedying it. Kudos!!!

Like JC23 says "One bite at a time"

Get with the wife, make up a game plan for the day and hit it hard. Once you have your game plan made, don't alter from it. If you say you are going to toss, put the blinders on, don't look around, but toss. Same for the wife. Move forward and don't move back. Set a goal for the 8 hour day. Get one room cleaned out completely, items tossed, then both go out for a nice dinner afterwards as a reward. Make piles as to what can go where. This pile goes to the ReStore, this pile goes to The Salvation Army, this pile goes to the curb for trash day, so on and so forth. Then try you best to hit those goals everyday. Set a timeframe as to when you want it all completed. Something like New Years day would be realistic. Then stick to it. Don't get up and look at it and say "I'll do that tomorrow" Hit it head on full force. Pretty soon that elephant will be down to one bite left and you guys will have your normal lives back.

Everyone on here is pulling for you guys

Kevin,
Great advice, and I'll take it. I'm already starting piles. The wife has some half price dinner coupons and wanted to go out tonight. I told her tomorrow would be a better way to end the week and reward ourselves. Another thing I'm going to do is to take back possession. As soon as it is ready I'm putting a TV in the living room so it can be used for it's intended purpose.
Bill

 

[schwalby]

Random idea, no idea if it is good or bad.

Rick's post got me thinking about the room by room wall by wall thing. What about this. Take some white sheets and tack them to the ceiling blocking two walls. This will force you to focus on just the one wall and not allow the other walls to overwhelm you.

Just don't let those sheets be a way for you to ignore or forget about the other walls forever. Don't want to cover up the problem just want to focus you and make the elephant look a little smaller.

If you think for a second that this idea may get you in more trouble and allow you to ignore things PLEASE don’t do it. I want to help and be here for you in this, not slow down your progress.

 

[bczygan]

Bill, once again, kudos to you for what you are posting AND for what you have accomplished to this date!

Back in my original post (#174), I suggested a very useful site that I hope will become a reference and resource tool which you will use daily:
http://www.ocfoundation.org/hoarding/

The reason I bring this up again is because of what you wrote in a recent post - (#244)
"Another price is the money and time and effort spent to acquire all this junk. That all could have been resources spent elsewhere. It is a good part of the reason we have a crushing credit card debt. I don't even know how much. At least 20K. Probably a lot more. Time for a change in the way of living."
I'm no psychologist but you may have hit the nail on the head as to the root cause of your hoarding; control over your finances! Please, do yourselves a favor and get some help to discover and resolve those issues, whatever they may be.
I hope you continue to post your progress here on GJ, but also participate in a forum which targets not only the symptom (HOARDING), but also the true causative problems which foster and force the symptom. Until you start addressing those driving issues, you may not be able to 'see the forest for the trees'. Good Luck with your work on the symptom, and in finding a cure for the disorder.

Thanks for the reminder. Funny how I completely forgot your prior post and that website... Little bit of denial going on there. But I must realize that I have the affliction and do something about it or the problems will recur. I do note that their example photo on the home page of the website is not what I consider real hording, just excessive messiness and the beginnings of hoarding. What I have must be, because it denies me the use of my rooms and reduces my quality of life by restricting my social life, making me live in fear of discovery and costing me time and money. It is scary and exhilarating to try to get out of this fix. Not at all sure it is possible. Your help is deeply appreciated.

 

[bczygan]

Random idea, no idea if it is good or bad.

Rick's post got me thinking about the room by room wall by wall thing. What about this. Take some white sheets and tack them to the ceiling blocking two walls. This will force you to focus on just the one wall and not allow the other walls to overwhelm you.

Just don't let those sheets be a way for you to ignore or forget about the other walls forever. Don't want to cover up the problem just want to focus you and make the elephant look a little smaller.

If you think for a second that this idea may get you in more trouble and allow you to ignore things PLEASE don’t do it. I want to help and be here for you in this, not slow down your progress.

Good idea. You picked up on exactly how I feel right now. I am doing a bit of that by attacking a room and ignoring all the others. And I throw out a box or bag of trash as soon as it is full to avoid retrieving items and to declutter the room as fast as possible. But even the half of the living room that needs basic trash removal and sorting is too big a task. I'm going down there right now and mentally divide the job into on the couch or on the floor parts. I'm doing the couch first as it's smaller. Thanks!
Bill

 

[cafyrman]

Bill,
Fantastic job. Like many others you've been an inspiration to me. And like many others here I have a tendency towards a little hoarding myself. As Rick mentioned, there's a definite familial link. Fortunately, my wife likes things clean and has kept me somewhat in line. After a few weeks of cleaning in my new place (moved in Sept '09), I could actually park a car in my garage for the first time in my 15 years of home ownership. Of course, the new place has a three car garage, so that helps.

I've picked up a couple of common threads reading all the way through this. As others have mentioned you and your wife need to stop buying things. It sounds to me like there are some emotional issues revolving around the security of having "things". That's going to take professional help.

You also mention that your small trash bins are roughly the same as a dumpster. Maybe. But around here a dumpster only costs $50 for three days and holds three yards of trash. Sell one pop up and you could afford 2-3 real dumpsters. As I get better about cleaning, I get one every year and get rid of stuff that's accumulated or that I've finally decided to let go. A real dumpster will really help things move along.

One last suggestion that I don't think I've seen here. Contact the show Hoarders. Send your pictures to them to show how far you've come and your desire to improve. Maybe they'll help with some counseling and funding for disposal. Just throwing it out there.

Lastly, keep up the good work. We're all with you!

 

[fergus]

Bill,

Your sir, are to be commended for taking some bold steps to start this whole process and to share it all with this community. I'm still following along.

I understand what it's like to be faced with a task that just seems impossible, to lose all motivation for a task before you even begin. To just return to the couch or somewhere else to "hide" from something that you actually want to do, but don't have the guts to tackle. Starting is always the hardest part is what I've had to learn over and over again.

But, you've already started. So that means its all downhill from here on out.

Its all downhill buddy.

Keep on moving.

Tim

 

[bczygan]

Bill,
Fantastic job. Like many others you've been an inspiration to me. And like many others here I have a tendency towards a little hoarding myself. As Rick mentioned, there's a definite familial link. Fortunately, my wife likes things clean and has kept me somewhat in line. After a few weeks of cleaning in my new place (moved in Sept '09), I could actually park a car in my garage for the first time in my 15 years of home ownership. Of course, the new place has a three car garage, so that helps.

I've picked up a couple of common threads reading all the way through this. As others have mentioned you and your wife need to stop buying things. It sounds to me like there are some emotional issues revolving around the security of having "things". That's going to take professional help.

You also mention that your small trash bins are roughly the same as a dumpster. Maybe. But around here a dumpster only costs $50 for three days and holds three yards of trash. Sell one pop up and you could afford 2-3 real dumpsters. As I get better about cleaning, I get one every year and get rid of stuff that's accumulated or that I've finally decided to let go. A real dumpster will really help things move along.

One last suggestion that I don't think I've seen here. Contact the show Hoarders. Send your pictures to them to show how far you've come and your desire to improve. Maybe they'll help with some counseling and funding for disposal. Just throwing it out there.

Lastly, keep up the good work. We're all with you!

Funny, but funny-serious. For the last two days Julie has been sending me CL postings. She printed out a bunch of garage sales with photos of TOOLS!!!
i WAS SORELY TEMPTED! ONE HAD PHOTOS OF ADJUSTABLE WRENCHES AND A POWER WASHER!
But I demurred.......claiming the living room was in the middle of being a mess (True) and I wanted to make more progress (also true). I honestly thanked her for her thoughtful effort and let it go. Fixed us a great dinner of sauerkraut, potatoes, blood hurka and sour cream and beer. The sales started at 9AM and all the good stuff was probably gone anyway.

........and I don't need EVERY wrench ever made!

Dumpster idea is in my pocket. I didn't fill but one of mine this week. My courville container is bigger than a regular outside trash can. It is 96 Gal. or just over 1/2CY. I have between 3.3 and 6.6 CY (Or more if I over-stuff) capacity each week if I hustle and refill and put them out across the street. Dumpster space isn't the narrow pipe, my ability and resolve to use the available space is.
The show is an option, but I already feel extremely exposed right here on GJ
I do want a more permanent solution, so I have be reading the websites offered and will do what it takes to rearrange my thinking. Counseling is always a great thing to take advantage of. I am a firm believer and past customer when needed.

 

[mdbeck1]

...It is a good part of the reason we have a crushing credit card debt. I don't even know how much. At least 20K. Probably a lot more. Time for a change in the way of living....

Sorry about the long post.... ...but you hit a sensitive spot.

Our church has a course that they teach every few years. I think it's called "Financial Peace University". No it's not a bunch of praying about your finances. It helps you organize where you spend and how you spend and where you should be spending. I used some of the concepts and hopefully within a couple of years I will be debt free for the first time since I was 16 (I'm 50 now).

You start by making a budget. You probably won't be able to live within it for a few months but it's a plan. Don't forget "mad money" and "junk food" but don't make it a huge amount. In fact the wife and I used to have a category called "garage sale". It was only $20.00 every two weeks but we tried to stay within that amount. She got $10.00 and so did I. We had lots of fun with that.

Then you look at the credit cards and other loans that need to be paid off. Move the funds from the areas with the highest interest rate to the lowest interest rates. Pay off those loans with the highest interest rate first. Then take the money you were paying on those loans and accelerate the payments on the next level of loans. It takes a while but you will eventually get there.

Start a savings account. Put a small amount in it each month. Start with $10.00 or $20.00 per paycheck. This is money for an "emergency". You define that. I used mine for buying a set of tires on the RV last week. Again it takes a while to build up any significant funds but keep at it.

 

[mdbeck1]

... But this is all just clean out the **** work. Sorting through and finding and tossing the garbage or ruined things.

The next step will be harder. Deciding what usable things to part with by sale or donation.
...

It sounds to me like you have a decent place to start.
1. Pull the trash and get it out.

2. Decide what to sell, donate, keep.

3. Sell, donate, move to the appropriate location.

Pick out a piece of a room and just do what you have been doing.


...and for the record my garage was in pretty rough state earlier this year. I had a couple of paths going to the toolbox and the front and back of the garage. I started the same way. My goal was to be able to work on a car in my two car garage. Steps:
1. I pulled the trash and threw it away.
2. I pulled all of the stuff that needed to go to donation and got rid of it.
3. I put stuff away. I still didn't have enough room.
4. I built some shelving and got the stuff that I was planning on keeping in tubs on them. I still didn't have enough room. So I bought some shelves. Now it's all off of the floor.

Since you started your thread you have "freed" me to do the following steps:
5. I hauled two trailer loads of scrap steel to the scrap yard. I used the money to pay for some of the shelving materials and to buy lunch for me and my son.
6. I took a break here... I hooked finished my compressor closet and put the compressor in there. It looks good and works better and it's out of the center of the garage entry.
7. One of the neighbors was doing a remodel of his house. I "donated" a lot of partial sheets of sheetrock, 2X4s, hardiboard, .... to his remodel. He's also "borrowed" some of my woodworking tools (more stuff out of the way while I clean). They'll come back in a week or so.
8. One of the people at church wanted some file cabinets. They are stacked against the new shelving units waiting for delivery. I've had them for several weeks and last night told them that at 10:00 AM Saturday they were going to the scrap yard. I don't mind delivering but they need to get their stuff out of my garage.

So you see you are influencing a LOT of people.

Don't forget to give yourself a "break" once in a while. Do something or work on a project for a day or two that you want to. Just don't make the break too long.

 

[mdbeck1]

...The plus that you have over me is many more toters( dumpsters ) . I have 2 of them and must leave most of one of them for household garbage every week...

Did you think about putting some of the trash in cardboard boxes or trash bags and dropping one or two in the park dumpster OR at the dumpster at work OR ...???

I know that in some places it's illegal to put your trash in someone elses' dumpster so I'd be careful. However I believe that the park dumpsters and even the city dump are free (or low cost). Fortunately I have a pickup and once in a while I end up taking a load or two to the transfer station.

 

[bczygan]

Did you think about putting some of the trash in cardboard boxes or trash bags and dropping one or two in the park dumpster OR at the dumpster at work OR ...???

I know that in some places it's illegal to put your trash in someone elses' dumpster so I'd be careful. However I believe that the park dumpsters and even the city dump are free (or low cost). Fortunately I have a pickup and once in a while I end up taking a load or two to the transfer station.

Good point about city yards. We have one on each side of the city. You can bring a PU load a week of bagged household trash and also yard debris. No construction materials. Still a great deal. And a CY or Refr. size bulk curbside trash pick up every 3 months (Used to be every month).

 

[hotrodjeep]

I takes alot to realize that the way your living can not continue.
Thanks you so much, for doing this infront of us, you can help yourself and in the
process motivate and inspire those of us (myself included) that feel cleaning and
organizing is too big of a job.

Don't forget to love your wife on this jorney. If, you see the end before her, she may feel
that she has no place in it with you. She may feel like somthing your tring to get rid of.
You seem to have a good hold of how things should go.

Love your Wife, Love your Life. One step at a time, you will get there Together.

Your Idea to concentrate on one area at a time will come together in the long run.
Each new area that is open and organized will snowball into the next.

Jeff. (Can't wait to see that Bridgport up and runnig!!)

 

[lwlobo]

I really admire your resolve, Bill! A number of people have said you've inspired them, and hopefully you know it really is true. I'm not a particularly emotional guy, but I've been touched by your story so far and am rooting for you and your wife.

Hoarding is familiar topic for me and my wife. We have family members who are full blown hoarders (they have a house in town and a 7 acre farm out of town that are literally full of stuff, mostly junk). We've seen and experienced the difficulty their habits have caused themselves and their loved ones. We also have some those tendencies and see them in some of the family. We've had stretches where we couldn't have guests at our house due to messiness, or at least had to make sure certain doors were closed before anyone could come in, or could it was difficult get around in certain rooms.

As you may know, this is not an uncommon problem. No one knows because many hoarders hide it, but there are probably hundreds of thousands of people with this problem in the US. As people, we don't know how to handle stuff very well, and place unhealthy value on things. Many of us GJ people hoard tools we may never use. Usually this is not a problem, but it can become one.

My wife and I have made good strides in the last year. Moving helped a lot, and I spent hour after hour going through stuff in my old garage, in the piles that were in our old bedroom, etc.

You have a very long way to go, but there is hope. We've had friends over to our house frequently during the last year. My new garage is a mess (it's collected much of the stuff that still needs to be thrown away/organized/put away), but I can get around in it. Last night I reloaded ammunition in my garage. There is a lot more to do, although it seems doable now.

Like others have said, hoarding often is a surface symptom of deeper emotional issues. Getting rid of junk and generating hope may go a long way, but at some point I hope you and your wife get someone to help you walk through these issues.

Thanks for your example, and the best of luck to you.

Best Regards,

lwlobo

BTW, please keep taking pictures and writing down your story and progress. I could see the story of your courage in dealing with this problem making a good book or movie someday. Plus, it serves as an inspiration for the rest of us.

 

[magnusk750]

Let me pop in here with an estonian expression. If you see someone working, or if you come to visit someone and he/she is in the middle of something we can say: Joudu tööle! or just Joudu! (Force to your work! or the short version: Force!), and then the guy who is working answers automatically: Joudu tarvis (force is needed!)

So: Joudu!

You have an expression in your country, that I find quite commendable. You are an AmeriCAN, not an AmeriCAN’T. I like that expression.

But here in Oz, we’d say “Good onya mate! You’ll be right. Just keep pushing on”

 

[bczygan]

lwlobo,
Stories like yours are what inspire ME!

 

[bczygan]

hotrodjeep,
I WILL treat my wife with patience, kindness and gentleness...........she won't know what the hell is going on!!!

Seriously, I want back a lot more than a clean house. I want the close, loving partnership we had 22 years ago when we married.

It really doesn't matter who began this process. But someone had to.

 

[IMXCITD]

this is a great thread and I commend you for having the courage and strength to make a huge change in your life. Getting rid of clutter and organizing your life will pay off in so many ways and make both of you happier people....individually and as a couple. Keep making small steps forward each day and your progress will be a huge reward! You should be proud of yourself!!

 

[rickairmedic]

Ok Bill I saw you went shopping so I figured I better check in up here and see how your doing .

Rick

 

[bczygan]

Ok Bill I saw you went shopping so I figured I better check in up here and see how your doing .

Rick

Rick.....you caught me. I found an old USA made 40's vintage Buffalo floor model drill press. Agonized over getting it but have been wanting a good DP for a while and pulled the trigger. It is my reward for doing the garage, and shortly will be in there and operable. Right now it is at the foot of the stairs in the living room where I set it up for a little R&R for me, drilling and tapping holes. So today got eaten up doing all this. And Julie and I didn't get out for dinner, but rather checked on some used cabinets to redo the kitchen. Turned out they were too small, which is good. I don't need another project right now.....focus, focus!
I have overstuffed a dumpster and have also a pile of boxes outside for disposal. In the living room I have sorted much of the stuff in there and have piles ready to go where they must.
Here's the link to the Buffalo DP thread.

So tonight I will wrap up with the following plan for the morning:
1. Move gas cans to garage.
2. Clean pile in garage and move and set up DP in garage.
3. Determine location for 13 drawer roller and begin emptying it for move to garage.

That should be enough to get going on....!

 

[rickairmedic]

I understand Bill I picked up the 59 Craftsman Drill press and 2 59 craftsman bench lights and a 64 craftsman bench grinder yesterday myself . We will need pictures of the drill press and tool cabinet out in the garage all set up though .

Rick

 

[mdbeck1]

I understand Bill I picked up the 59 Craftsman Drill press and 2 59 craftsman bench lights and a 64 craftsman bench grinder yesterday myself . We will need pictures of the drill press and tool cabinet out in the garage all set up though .

Rick

Yes..... It should be set up in its proper place as soon as possible. A place for everything and everything in it's place.

My wife and I have a deal. We can't bring anything into the house (or garage) that we don't have a planned place for it. ...and if we don't already have a planned place we have to get rid of something of a similar size (...and NO she can't get rid of MY stuff to make room for HERS (and vice versus)).

 

[rickairmedic]

MD I will be listing the POS central machinery benchtop drill press anbd Ryobi bench grinder on CL this weekend if I get 50 for the pair I will be happy and will have more workbench space . I havent fully decided on the location of my new drill press but I think I will be adding casters to the front of the base so I can tilt it forward and move it out when I need to work on larger pieces on it .

Rick

 

[mdbeck1]

MD I will be listing the POS central machinery benchtop drill press anbd Ryobi bench grinder on CL this weekend if I get 50 for the pair I will be happy and will have more workbench space . I havent fully decided on the location of my new drill press but I think I will be adding casters to the front of the base so I can tilt it forward and move it out when I need to work on larger pieces on it .

Rick

I'm not so sure that putting casters on a drill press is a good idea but it's your tools and your shop. I've got a drill press in my wood shop and it moves around more than I would like without wheels on it. I've been thinking about bolting it to a piece of plywood to make it sit still better.

As far as listing the "lesser" tools on CL.... good idea.

 

[rickairmedic]

The casters mount to the front apron of the drill press so they are not actually on the ground until you tilt it forward . That way they dont hurt the machines stability when your using it but makes it alot easier to move around when needed . I will be making the same upgrade to my tablesaw as well.

Rick

 

[Omphaloskeptic]

bczygan, as one sage paraphrased it, "It's terribly difficult to remember the primary goal is to get in there, get your fat *** wet, grab hold of a shovel, and commence to drain the swamp, when at the present moment in time, a mean, hungry alligator is trying to eat said fat ***!".

That mean, hungry alligator is YOU going out and buying more ****, whether you think you need it or not. You need to focus on the alligator BEFORE he takes a chunk out of your ****; which by the way is where your wallet resides.

 

[Red Leader]

.....you caught me. I found an old USA made 40's vintage Buffalo floor model drill press.

I think we'll let this one slide for now

Only reason being that any sane person, hoarder or not, when seeing a fine, vintage, cast iron Made in USA tool, needs to buy it and give it a proper home. I know, I'm not much help

You did well. Now we need pictures.


We must see pictures.

Now remember, if you are going to start collecting vintage power tools (you will), do them justice and keep cleaning out that garage! Give them a home they'll be proud of

EDIT: one word of caution, on Buffalo drill presses the clamp that tightens the main casting onto the post presses on hollow cast iron, so if you torque the casting too tight on the post you can crack the main casting.