Between 485 & 705 SQ/FT Mid-Century Moto Mecca Makeover

[isonic]

I've been following your thread since the beginning, and the amount of intricate, large-scale projects you have finished... is astounding. So don't forget that!

Yeah seriously. I also have been around for most or all of this thread and without looking back I remember the bathroom tile reno, kitchen cabinets, countertops, the wood in the living room ceiling being redone, those cabinets in the living room with the fans displayed, and the countless motorcycle projects completed in time for a show. All completed projects. Plus the pizza you thought all of us to make, the knives, the welding, the fabrication, the photography lessons to boot.

Sometimes it is hard to see what we have accomplished when all we see are things left to do. Take a moment to stop and smell the roses every once in a while. You deserve it.

 

[bugnut]

Gregor, couple of things come to mind as I read your postings.
As for your sister and the end of driving, in Ohio the neurologist typically sends the person, for a driving test. This can also be done for older parents. If the tester decides the driving skills are not good the license is revoked and done. This extricates the family from the issue and makes the medical professionals the bad guys.

As for the trailer and the skate board shelf, if financially feasible sell or pay for repairs and brackets. I suggest this as time for the things you enjoy doing most are more valuable.

Candidly, Laras health is not going to improve, she will/does not remember todays breakfast, let alone decisions.

Personally my ability to continue doing what I need to do preserved(s) my mental health so I can deal with the other issues. Just my $.02.

I wish and pray for you all the best.

 

[gearhead1960]

Gregor,
You have some tough decisions to make. It's not going to get easier with Lara. I think you have to consider just how much the trailer is turning into a bottomless financial pit. You will never get your money out of it, no matter how much you think it is worth. It's still an old travel trailer that is still OLD. You will have to find the right person willing to spend the money and that will be like finding the proverbial needle. Sentimental reasons are another thing, but again, you have to decide really how valuable your sentiment is....

In regard to Lara, sadly and ultimately she will need to be institutionalized. Sooner or later, the trailer will probably become a safety issue to her as things will continue to break, and due to age, will not be as robust as you think.

Lastly, you are not alone in this and ultimately, the decision you and your family make will always be the right decision. Don't be afraid to lean on them and don't 2nd guess yourself.....

 

[y'sguy]

I agree with the last two posters. The last year(s) I spent with my father were hell due to Alzheimer's/dementia. my sis and I tried everything to fix it, slow it down, or understand it. We never quite could. He became unreadable and we eventually sought the help we needed. It is a horrible thing.
I did many projects, like you to find control, and help him in some way. I know now that was useless. Useless, because the next thing will happen very soon and you'll not be prepared for that one either. We can't fix it.

My memories now of him are the ones where I was just sitting around with him. Listening to him. We walked outside of the nursing care home and sat on the back of my old truck tailgate. He liked that, and he looked up at the sky and watched a plane fly over. He said he missed his airplane. This was our last best day.

That's all you can do, spend time with them.

And I want to add-we are not claiming to be experts at any of this. We made ALL the mistakes, as you will too.
Just be sure to drop what you are doing and spend the time with them.

 

[sakurama]

Thank you guys.

Yes, I am realizing that I need to simplify my life. I sold a bunch of riding gear in the last month or two and made maybe a $1000, a fraction of its worth, but the physical and mental space is worth more. I went on a ride the other day and went looking for my vented black pants and realized I'd sold them - huh, I still have gear. I don't miss the things I'm getting rid of.



Last week I said I was going to make Nadia that shelf she wanted and I did. I made a mistake and the french cleat didn't have the support it needed but instead of remaking it I just screwed it into a stud - done.



It felt better to have completed this poorly (because Nadia certainly didn't care) than to have tried to remake it.

It has taken months (7 so far) but I finally got Lara her neurological assessment test after staying on the phone for an hour and waiting for a supervisor. She had her first interview Friday and her next is in two weeks. I feel bad but I decided to gas light her about the driving and when I was on the phone with the doctor I kept talking after she'd hung up, "Oh, and you recommend that she not drive until we have the results from the test? Okay, yes, we can manage that if you think that's best" and Lara heard that and was totally fine with that decision since "it came from the doctor"

I feel bad but not as bad as I would if she hurt someone.

This coming week my mom and sister in law are coming to visit for her birthday so we have some distractions until the next test. I'm spending time with her, watching the olympics and hanging out with the kids. It is a relief to finally be starting to get the care we've been waiting for.

Gregor

 

[bugnut]

Gregor, shelf looks good and it is completed.
Good that the driving decision was acceptable.

Hang in there it is not easy.

 

[hewey]

Great to see you finding a way forward in challenging times. And yes, sometimes done is better than perfect.

 

[964haus]

When the bike was built it was a rush to finish it and then, over the years, it took a lot of abuse. To me there were a lot of details that were overlooked but make difference to the overall appearance like fasteners. I replaced most of the existing bolts with stainless and then turned all the heads to make them clean and get rid of the markings. Instead of stripping the frame and wheels I used a paint marker to hide chips.

Gregor - been a quiet fan since the days I stumbled upon your 950 build when you were still in NY many moons ago. Taking one of your ADV training classes is still on my "to do" list.....however, when I saw this photo I thought "How did he get Eddie Vedder to help him in his shop?????". Rock on, Gregor. You're an inspiration to many.

M

 

[bdking]

.....however, when I saw this photo I thought "How did he get Eddie Vedder to help him in his shop?????"

I drink waaaay less wine than EdVed and I service my own amps.

 

[burger]

Gregor,

I have been following along for years. You overcome things with style. Keep doing that.

Ed

 

[quadrcr87]

I bet that shelf is perfectly level with the Stabila sitting there.

When I get overwhelmed, completing small visible projects helps. If you see me cleaning and organizing my office at work you know I am having a rough day.

 

[GeddyT]

The Stabila was just to get it close before the Starrett machinists level came out...

 

[Robust2]

In the last two years I've occasionally read up on adult ADHD, and so much of it hits so incredibly close to home, that I've been trying (unsuccessfully) to find some help with it.
I don't care about any official diagnosis, but coping better with my own mind and behavior would be great.

One piece of advice I read a while ago and I suspect many and especially Gregor will feel intrinsically familiar with, is to eat the ice cream instead of the frog...

 

[Krfjkm]

Hey Gregor and others—. I just picked up a really sweet pair of Pioneer CS-99 speakers. Now I need a receiver.

Can you guys make any recommendations on what I should be looking for?

Thanks for any advice given!!

 

[Finallygotit]

Hey Gregor and others—. I just picked up a really sweet pair of Pioneer CS-99 speakers. Now I need a receiver.

Can you guys make any recommendations on what I should be looking for?

Thanks for any advice given!!

What's the budget?

 

[Krfjkm]

What's the budget?

Not huge… Thinking Pioneer SX-626

 

[BiTurbo228]

Well done on the driving front. I remember when my dad visited my grandma in her late stages of dementia she didn't recognise him, and kept asking when he'd be there even though he already was. The advice was broadly 'don't argue the point, try to join them in their fantasy'. They suggested to say something along the lines of 'he's just on his way, do you mind if I wait with you until he arrives?', which seemed to calm her down (even though the conversation happened 2 or 3 times).

On the ADHD front, my day job is trying to sort out health services for people with ADHD (and autistic people) in the UK. Mainly focussed on children, but there's a lot of work happening in the adult's space as well. It's fairly clear that there's been a massive unrecognised need around ADHD that's only really come out through increased public awareness, and everyone (public and services) are scrabbling to get a hold of what's needed to support people.

In my various research around it I've come across a pretty good bank of articles by the ADHD Foundation here in the UK (a not-for-profit outfit). A fair few won't be terribly relevant as they relate to regulatory stuff over this side of the pond, but there's a few bits and pieces in there people might find useful (and possibly wouldn't have come across before, it being a UK-based site).

Like all resource banks it's a bit of a mess to navigate, but if you filter for 'adults' there's some useful stuff there. This talk I've watched and thought was useful. It's good for children too if you recognise it in your own kids, and has some stuff around teaching practices which are useful at home as well as in conversations with schools.

 

[Novadave]

Gregor, I see quite few similarities between you and your situation and my current one. Some advice that I find helps me with regard to the never ending pile of unfinished jobs/projects. Make a list. A list for the big stuff, break it down into easy steps. Then a list for the day too day stuff too. Ticking items off at the end of the day helps me feel like I have actually achieved something even when sometimes I don't think that I really have! As an added benefit the daily list means I'm less likely to forget the stuff I was supposed to do anyway!

 

[HolyDrinker]

Gregor, I've been following this thread, and your social media, for some time but never actually completed reading it. Over some lunch breaks and free time I have reached this point. What a whirlwind of emotions and ups and downs the last few years. Hope all is well and that Lara is doing as best she can.

All the best

Sam

 

[sakurama]

Thanks Sam.

Yes, it has been a whirlwind. I sometimes open the thread and it starts from the first page and I can barely recognize that life. Nadia started high school this week. I'm still, 20 plus years on, shooting for Oprah but now in my house. My mortgage is now triple what it was when we bought the house and so many of my plans have gone unrealized.

Yet in many ways it's better. Just so unrecognizable from where I started. I don't think I've found my way just yet but I'm getting there. Getting closer.

Yesterday I had to pick up Lucas from violin and while we were waiting to pick up Nadia from cross country we sat in the car and talked. He was barely two when we bought the house. He's 13 now. He was telling me about a teacher he liked that reminded him of me and then, almost as an aside, said, "You know, whenever I ask someone a question they never know the answer. If I ask mom something she just says I don't know, my friends say they don't know and even my teachers sometimes. But you never say that. No matter what I ask you have an answer and then you go on this deep dive and explain everything for like 20 minutes... "

When I was little it frustrated me to no end that my father would never answer a simple question but instead pose a counter question, "Well, what do you think?" and then he'd let me puzzle it out. I still do that with Lucas but more than anything I want to share the process, share the wonder and share the knowledge and I hope that this thread does that.

I'm struggling with what is next. Trying to figure out where my life is going but it's certainly better. I have no idea what is going to happen in the next year or so but I know I need to reinvent myself again. The career I've had is slowly going away, AI is going to change things but the one thing that I think we will always appreciate is a good story.

G

 

[HolyDrinker]

Thanks Sam.

Yes, it has been a whirlwind. I sometimes open the thread and it starts from the first page and I can barely recognize that life. Nadia started high school this week. I'm still, 20 plus years on, shooting for Oprah but now in my house. My mortgage is now triple what it was when we bought the house and so many of my plans have gone unrealized.

Yet in many ways it's better. Just so unrecognizable from where I started. I don't think I've found my way just yet but I'm getting there. Getting closer.

Yesterday I had to pick up Lucas from violin and while we were waiting to pick up Nadia from cross country we sat in the car and talked. He was barely two when we bought the house. He's 13 now. He was telling me about a teacher he liked that reminded him of me and then, almost as an aside, said, "You know, whenever I ask someone a question they never know the answer. If I ask mom something she just says I don't know, my friends say they don't know and even my teachers sometimes. But you never say that. No matter what I ask you have an answer and then you go on this deep dive and explain everything for like 20 minutes... "

When I was little it frustrated me to no end that my father would never answer a simple question but instead pose a counter question, "Well, what do you think?" and then he'd let me puzzle it out. I still do that with Lucas but more than anything I want to share the process, share the wonder and share the knowledge and I hope that this thread does that.

I'm struggling with what is next. Trying to figure out where my life is going but it's certainly better. I have no idea what is going to happen in the next year or so but I know I need to reinvent myself again. The career I've had is slowly going away, AI is going to change things but the one thing that I think we will always appreciate is a good story.

G

Gregor,

I am somebody who is not unfamiliar with 180° transformations in life, however scary it may seem, you can only do what feels best for you and your family.

Working in the Telecom industry, AI is ever present in my scope of work. But some things can't be replicated, copied or cheated.

Storytelling is a skill as old as time, and you my friend are as skilled as anyone. You apply it in your photography, your posts online and with your friends and family I'm sure. If you take that passion and apply it to anything, you will find success.

Cheers

Sam

 

[Bad Mojo]

Thanks Sam.

Yes, it has been a whirlwind. I sometimes open the thread and it starts from the first page and I can barely recognize that life. Nadia started high school this week. I'm still, 20 plus years on, shooting for Oprah but now in my house. My mortgage is now triple what it was when we bought the house and so many of my plans have gone unrealized.

Yet in many ways it's better. Just so unrecognizable from where I started. I don't think I've found my way just yet but I'm getting there. Getting closer.

Yesterday I had to pick up Lucas from violin and while we were waiting to pick up Nadia from cross country we sat in the car and talked. He was barely two when we bought the house. He's 13 now. He was telling me about a teacher he liked that reminded him of me and then, almost as an aside, said, "You know, whenever I ask someone a question they never know the answer. If I ask mom something she just says I don't know, my friends say they don't know and even my teachers sometimes. But you never say that. No matter what I ask you have an answer and then you go on this deep dive and explain everything for like 20 minutes... "

When I was little it frustrated me to no end that my father would never answer a simple question but instead pose a counter question, "Well, what do you think?" and then he'd let me puzzle it out. I still do that with Lucas but more than anything I want to share the process, share the wonder and share the knowledge and I hope that this thread does that.

I'm struggling with what is next. Trying to figure out where my life is going but it's certainly better. I have no idea what is going to happen in the next year or so but I know I need to reinvent myself again. The career I've had is slowly going away, AI is going to change things but the one thing that I think we will always appreciate is a good story.

G

Your last paragraph struck me. That can be a very unsettling and uncomfortable feeling. I went through a period of drift with work and did end up getting a career coach which did helped with getting into a job and company that I really do enjoy. It is a weird but delightful feeling to not being think about the next job change. You are an expert in storytelling and they are an experts in working with people to find fulfilling work for themselves. I understand you tend to DIY most things and I follow a similar story arc, but I am glad I had some structure and guidance on this last job change. It took me a long time to come around to the idea of coaching might be useful, but I started with listening to that groups podcast and that was a nice way of dipping my toe in the pool so to speak without a lot risk. That podcast is called Happen to Your Career.

Take or it leave the above, but I hope where ever your next thing is you really enjoy it. It seems like you are coming into a possibly a very cool chapter of your life.

 

[quadrcr87]

Gregor- I saw you had a chance to ride with the legend Rick Johnson recently. That must have been quite an experience. That camera combined with your skills has taken your life on a pretty amazing journey.

 

[locul]

Hi Gregor

How are we, missing some updates. No matter what they are.

Hugz from Denmark

 

[sean Buick 76]

I just wanted to chime in and offer words of support! You’re going through a lot, keep your spirits up! I hate to say it but if you can sell the trailer as is it’s going to free up time for you to do other things.

I’m beginning to simplify my life one item at a time. Selling off or gifting away things that I’m not using or that require money and time to fix.

Best of luck!

 

[ayer]

This is the best thread on the entire internet. I may be a little late to this conversation, but I have ADHD, my father was a miserable person and his answer to me was to belt be and tell me to get over it. before I got out of high school I got a part time job in a body shop where we did mostly wrecks. Most jobs were in and out which was perfect for me. I worked there almost 20 years. It did help slightly in other aspects of life as did medication later in life. It is a struggle but it is doable.

 

[octane_matty]

I'm struggling with what is next. Trying to figure out where my life is going but it's certainly better. I have no idea what is going to happen in the next year or so but I know I need to reinvent myself again. The career I've had is slowly going away, AI is going to change things but the one thing that I think we will always appreciate is a good story.

Gregor, i wouldn't stress about AI, it will never have the creativity of humans like you and is absolutely over hyped currently. I work for a company that's trying desperately to use AI to improve productivity we've had very little success despite promise after promise from various AI vendors.

I'll vote for return of the Saku-Moto channel

 

[sakurama]

Hi Gregor

How are we, missing some updates. No matter what they are.

Hugz from Denmark

Okay you ******* - you win. ;-)

It's been a real whirlwind the last few months. On many levels. Some hard and some great. I tend to not post unless I feel I have something worthwhile to contribute and since I've not been building anything but my sanity I don't post. My brother's take on social media is that it's either "bitching or bragging" and while I don't feel that way about forums or certainly about this place I do feel that's becoming more accurate for social and my tendency is to withdraw.

Last month Sacha (my brother) came to visit. The point of the visit was to take my sister back to Colorado to live with my mom. Over the last 4 or so months she's gotten considerably worse and much more dependent on me for daily care. A year ago I'd have put her at a 10-12 year old level of competence and now I'd say 3-4 year old. I had to fix all her meals and she wandered around like a homeless person constantly losing her phone, her purse... whatever was in her hand. Anytime I had to leave town she had no idea where I was despite telling her, leaving notes and preparing food ahead of time. It was overwhelming me.



Fortunately Sacha, like me, tries to prioritize sanity through self care so he added days to his trip so we could take our bikes to the coast and spend a couple of days riding. I'd suggested going up to Mt Hood but being from Colorado he said he'd rather be in the wet woods and ocean breezes.





We rode bikes and stayed in Cannon Beach at an inn right on the water. It was a great couple of days. At the end of it we helped Lara pack some clothes and told her she was taking a little vacation to Colorado for the holidays. The day after she left was shockingly lonely. As much as I spent time being annoyed by her constant neediness it was hard to handle knowing she's gone and most likely not coming back.

I went to Colorado for Thanksgiving and spent time with my Mom, Len and Lara and I think she's happier now. Maybe content is more appropriate.



It's sad to gas light your own sister but she's not able to handle or comprehend the complex truths around her condition and so keeping it simple is the best way to feel her information.

A few months ago I started to work on a story I very much wanted to tell a few years ago but wasn't able to and then Oprah took over my life and I didn't finish. I'm mostly there so I think I'll pick that up. I just got back from a trip to Miami with Ducati and it was good for the soul. Work is winding down and I should have time to come back here in the coming weeks.

Thanks for checking in.

Gregor

 

[hewey]

Gregor I've been following your insta stories and the Ducati work, it's great to get that behind the scenes insight into your work and how you work with others.

Sorry to hear about Lara's decline, I'd been thinking of you and wondering how she was going. That's really tough on all of you. It sounds like her move is for the best for her and for yourself. It's natural to feel guilt about the 'gaslighting', but I think you're looking after her wellbeing and happiness as best as you can given the circumstances, with empathy and love. That's not easy.

AI is going to change things but the one thing that I think we will always appreciate is a good story.

Story telling will never go away, its been one of the most constant factors in human history I reckon, and has just continued to evolve in modern times as tech has likewise evolved. As AI evolves to the point where it is indistinguishable from 'reality', the human stories that have the insights into what made those happen is what is going to stand out as something special. You're in a great position with your technical photography skills and general story telling skills (like this thread, your insta stories etc) to help brands do that.

The thing I've realised for myself, is that I can watch a doco or self made vlog on almost any topic, if it has the right combination of passionate presenter/story teller, and beautiful cinematography.

One of the best things I've watched recently is train nerd Francois Bourgeois and auto journo Chris Harris driving an AMG to film a steam train at full tilt. It's a slow start and has the cliche 'set up', but the unbridled joy and enthusiasm at the end is just palpable. So good.

 

[jake28]

Gregor, thank you for sharing. Rooting for you and your whole family.

 

[yhprum]

Gregor, good to hear from you, thanks for letting us know you’re working through it.
Hoping all the best for you, it makes me want to never take anything for granted, every good day is a gift.

 

[locul]

HA...i just yelled to Nanna that you have replied in a proper way. Warms my heart.
Just thx Gregor. Nice to hear from you. Thanks for sharing the reality. In Denmark life is winding down to and making room for a easy Christmas vacation, though im a bit more to the vacation part. I hope the kids are doing great. Looking forward to the story.

regards

 

[Geoff289]

Ah mate! Don't know what else to say.

Your thread is a constant and continuing inspiration to us all. I'll leave it there.

 

[bugnut]

Gregor, Lara's decline is part of the journey. Glad you're able to help, it is terribly hopeless and frustrating. Can't wait for the story. Take care!

 

[BORING HOP YARD]

Thank you for the nice update Gregor.
Stay strong!

 

[gearhead1960]

Gregor,

Thanks for sharing. There are silver linings everywhere. I think you can rest easy knowing Lara will live out her days in comfort and safety without a clue. Reminds me of a late cousin that was asked prior to their passing (of a physical wasting disease) if she would change anything. Her reply was... she wished she had lost her mind vs. her current condition, as she thought it would have been better to not know what was happening to her than suffer the physical pain and discomfort she was experiencing.

 

[rharman]

@sakurama - Don't feel guilty about the gaslighting. We went through that with my mother in 2002. My sister and I were taking her to an Alzheimers care facility up north where my sister lives. We told my mom we were going up to my sisters house and to see a quilt show. The next morning, we told her we were stopping by my sisters work for a minute. We led her into the facility and that was her home for the next 7 years.

I had a lot of guilt beforehand about not telling her the truth but she would not have understood the truth anyway. Once we got her in the facility, my guilt disappeared. It was a very nice environment for her condition and they took good care of her.

You've done right by her including this change. Sorry you and your family are in this situation. Dementia *****!

 

[Bob Heine]

Gregor, gaslighting is sometimes necessary and beneficial. You also know Lana is unintentionally gaslighting you, insisting she's fine and you're the crazy one.

In her final years I cared for my mother with daily visits to cook her dinners and make sure she took her medicine, to take her shopping and to make sure she had money to take our son and his 7 children out for a meal when he came to visit her. Soon after she turned 90 she told her doctors (and everyone else) she was 100. I could see her get very upset every time someone told her she wasn't that old. For her 95th birthday we got a 100 candle to go on her cake. In her presence, until the day she died I told everyone she was 100 (with a hand sign she was 5 less [best I could do]).

 

[Revvyj]

Gregor, I don't usually post on forums but I wanted to thank you. I have been following this thread for a few years now and no matter what your post is about, from renovations, to fabrication to family I always appreciate it when you post. Thank you for taking the time to share your life with us.
I also appreciate the responses. To all those who engage, thank you. You make the forum a richer, better place.

 

[Azz_vt]

Merry Christmas Gregor, I hope your doing well.